hi Tatoulia! Glad you checked in also, and I echo SubC's thoughts that whatever is going on gets better and you are lifted up in peace and hope.

SubC, your art sounds so healing. I think creating things, and/or helping others create things, is such a beautiful thing. Do you make any sculptures of animals? In my dreams if we ever were able to meet or connect off this board I would love to commission you to make a German Shepherd for me, in honor of my best girl dog who passed and my heart is still broken over her. My son made me a clay German Shepherd when he was in high school art, and I treasure it. I love having art that friends made. I have a painting in my living room that a friend did as a gift, and some little things like painted rocks and such from friends.

I have to work today but the person I need to work with on a project is out sick. I am not sure what to do about that as I need it done by Weds. I will check in the office about it.

SubC, my bed is not bad. It is queen size and I use it as a staging area but I never sleep in it with junk still on it, even if I have to just throw everything on the floor or a chair. When I was cleaning off my night stand, I started to dust the headboard but didn't finish, so when I dust the other nightstand today I will also dust the headboard. Maybe I will vacuum some of the dust bunnies from under the bed as well.

I love your imagery of my room.

Right now, when I step out of the bed, I have maybe a foot of clear-ish floor to walk to the master bathroom. There is stuff strewn all around a rocking chair that is between the bed and the closet. It is like a landfill and I can barely get to the closet at all. So that is the next area... working my way FROM the bed, outward... so, between the bed and the rocking chair, then later, the rocking chair piles itself, then later, between the chair and the closet. The amount of stuff in that small area could fill the back of my SUV. It has all been sorted before and nothing was donate-able but I am looking with new eyes.

So I will at least start picking up on the floor and edging towards the rocking chair today.

I have a few cute containers that I can use to bring my lunch to work or places. I can't put them in the kitchen because other people use them, leave them dirty, microwave/warp them. But they really can't stay on my bedroom floor. Maybe I can find space on a shelf in there.

Good morning!

Coffee clinks.

Tatoulia, I'm glad you checked in. I hope whatever has been keeping you quiet is ok.

CM good job on the exercise and the books!

Lila, I am visualizing a wave of cleanliness and order spreading across your room from the nightstand. How is your bed?

I spent three hours in the studio yesterday - all of it cleaning up and organizing. I'm not sure what I accomplished. I have some small boxes to go to school (some things temporarily, as examples), and a bag of trash, and I put my new molds into a box with the molds I already had that were scattered around the room, but I'm not sure where to put the box.

I think my next goal in there is to try to clear off my slab roller and work table so I can do a project.
I'm going to either plant things or work on school stuff while Bean naps today.

Bean helped me with the laundry a little yesterday. I still have a lot more to do.

Praying for your sweet son, Road.

Oh no, Road! So sorry about your son being in the hospital! I hope he gets well quickly. He sounds like a sweetheart.

SubC, be sure to fit in that rest and recovery at some point. Coming from someone else who has a hard time fitting it in...

CM, slow and steady. You are doing good! I too am picking away at my bedroom. I am tripping over stuff and everything is lost in piles. Let's imagine a clean neat room with plenty of floor visible and clear surfaces, where when we go in there we can find what we are looking for pretty fast.

I did get that nightstand cleared the other day and I was so proud of myself. I slept next to a clean dust free nightstand for the first time in many months (years?) All that is on it is a lamp, clock, 2 books on top of the kindle, with a pencil next to it. It looks bewilderingly nice.

I was motivated by this to clean off the nightstand on the other side of the bed, which is in disuse but piled. Mostly coins I was sorting. I put them all into a little plastic container and put it in a drawer. Took the papers off there and put them with other papers. Threw away a ribbon (which will go on the daily tally. I was saving it forever for who knows what). Now I just need to dust it and it will be nice. The only things on there are a lamp, sunrise clock, and a little jewelry box.

Bit by bit I will make room for myself in there. I started closest to the bed and will work my way out.

Worked today, and leaving for a social visit in 45 minutes.

Prayers for speedy and complete recovery for your son, Road.

Lila, you're accomplishing a lot. I put the 2 cubic feet of books from yesterday on the Daily Tally.

Today I also found the box of writing how-to books that I want to keep - I had found those two at the recycling place that really will be useful, and I knew I had a few others but couldn't find them in the bedroom jungle. Yesterday's trip to the storage unit, besides netting me the other books to donate, also helped me determine I hadn't taken the writing books there. After I came home from church I had a look in the bedroom and unearthed them in a minute.

The bedroom has a long way to go, but I'm picking away at it and beginning to remember what was sort of where ("sort of where" is one of those terms only we clutterbug types understand) when I pretty much gave up mid-pandemic. It is truly akin to an archaeological dig. Layer by layer, and don't break stuff trying to get it out. But really, I feel positive about it. Especially because of the way my brain is working even when I'm not in there, mentally doing a tour and noting things that I'm going to be able to live without more than I thought. All that remains is to remove them physically.

This coming week I'll need to focus in on paperwork - student loan yearly payment plan renewal, and possibly file a tax return, or not. Most years I don't need to but I'll need to check. It's the sort of task I really dislike and must make myself do. And then reward when it's complete.

After that, along with decluttering, computer stuff, etc. I want to resume sewing. Well, that will entail a bit of decluttering first to make a space again to put the machine. But it's not too bad. I am determined that I'm finally going to get the pockets and drawstrings put in the cotton knit shorts my friend gave me, especially because one thing I want to do this spring is go through all my clothes. I'd like to have the shorts finished so then I can lay them out along with other ones and see what's what.

This afternoon I took a little walk up and down the block a few times. Since one of my dumb phobia things is that I don't like to go on foot further than the block where I live, I thought fine, I'll just go several laps. It still counts as exercise, still burns calories. And the endorphins, who knows, maybe they'll help me get braver ultimately.

I like being on the upward spiral at last.

We've had more bunny health things going on - this time my roommate's boy had the stomach issues. He's recovering slowly. We'll keep troubleshooting some preventatives. My two are doing fine and my roommate's girl is A-OK.

Saw some goats on the way to the cemetery on Friday and thought of you, SubC.

Hi to Tatoulia, hope all is well with you.

Oh road, I am so sorry about your son! Itmust be scary to be in the hospital and not really understand all the tests. I hope that he will recover quickly!

Lila, sorry it's a work day for you. I would say staying home and having grands over always beats party!

Today is my first real rest and recover day in along time. I still haven't gone out to do chores! Poor animals. They will be ok though, they got taken care of at 11:00 last night when I got home.

Chores, laundry, studio, plant some things, Dh wants his hair cut, the bunny needs brushing and a cage clean out. The chicks need a cage clean out, lessons to prep. probably have about six hours left until the kids show up with Bean. ok, forget what I said about resting and recovering, I caught up a couple of hours of a large sleep deficit.

Yesterday I spent the days at a really great teacher workshop - it is free and happens every year and I always try to go. Then Dh picked me up and we went downtown to the symphony. Fun, but tiring.

The studio gives us 20% off everything in stock the day of the workshop, so I restocked as much as I could for my class, and also bought some new toys for me. Two pages of decals (consumable) and 8 little molds - I'm not sure if the6 qualify as tools or equipment, but they are 8 items in.

I know I should be cleaning my studio out instead, but I couldn't resist.

Hey all,

It's me Road "Live from a Hospital - Part 3"
My son had to go back to the hospital again. Can't remember where I left off but back on the 22nd we brought him in with stomach or back pain, fever, and GI symptoms. They eventually found pneumonia. Got on meds, gradually got better, went home for four days and took a turn on last Tuesday and we had to come back. This time extreme fatigue, pain and fever returning. Lots of issues diagnosing him with us not being able to understand what he was experiencing and not being able to get good results on scams etc where you have to be able to hold still and follow directions etc. Ugh. Anyway yesterday had to have a chest tube put in to deal with fluid build up and hope they don't find any infection. We are here for a few more days at least. He has been as sweet and cheerful as a poor guy can be under that much distress. It's been tough for everyone.

Just wanted to let you know what was going on. Hugs To everyone and any prayers or healing vibes for this guy appreciated. 💓💓💓

hi friends,

I had a busy day working. I got invited to a party I was planning to attend this evening but I just burned right out. I am not that social. I decided to stay home, and the grandtots came over. That was better than a party.

I keep thinking it is Friday instead of Saturday and forgetting I have to work in the morning. I don't feel like it. I am such a slug sometimes. Sigh.

I gave one item away today so I will add that to the daily tally.

Good evening!

Sitting here with my candles by the fire sipping a glass of wine.

Tatoulia, are you ok? I'm concerned because it was supposed to be very cold in New England.

Lila, the rent makes sense. As long as you have other areas to work on and are still finding more of his stuff - why not let him pay rent. And maybe he will carry some of the things away for you.

Crocs are shoes! So 4 pairs of shoes! And those three gone! Hurray!

And great job on the nightstand. Now guard your space! I hope you will be able to get the bed cleared off.

I have a lot of those random spaces. Sometimes I can make progress if I am going to another room to put away the thing - like a pen, by trying to spot how many other (pens) I can find and grab on the way.

CM, I'm glad your trip went well.

Tomorrow I have an all day teacher workshop and then Dh is picking me up and we have a concert. I will be quite tired! Should probably get to bed early.

Tonight begins the second quarter of the year. Planting and growing, challenges and beginnings and bringing new things into being..

Made it home at 4:25 p.m. Trip going was amazingly anxiety free. Trip returning was a little touch and go at first but I got more settled in. Lots of interactions and significances for my mind to process on the return trip, is probably why it was a bit more challenging. And my cousin turned on the talk radio that was more stimulating than I would've preferred. However, all in all things went well.

Today was payday for me but I'll have to do the banking and stuff tomorrow. And pay the storage unit rent. Will drop off Christmas items and pick up Valentine's, and maybe find some items to pull out. Just to get the ball rolling. But I'm kinda tired so no big ambitions. These little sorties are helpful though even if they're small, because they give me a chance to assess things. And I'm still plenty motivated, no worries. By the time spring weather gets here I believe I will be in a good position to get a lot done, and I'll be doing small amounts between now and then.

Nightstand progress:

Wow what a mess. I can't even tell you. If you took my house and shrank it down to a nightstand size, that is what it was like. A mini-hoard.

First I took everything off. I threw away 3 things and donated 1 thing. I put a coin in the coin jar, a bunch of pens on another surface (ugh), other pens in a pen jar, colored pencils in a pencil bag. I put some hand creams in my bathroom drawer and some in the hall closet for common use. I put the paperwork that has a home into its home.

A couple items went into the drawer. I put a thermometer away in its place.

I tested the CD player and it seems to work, so I got the canned air and cleaned it out, and dusted the outside of it and plugged it in. I looked online earlier for a replacement with no luck so will keep this one.

I dusted the phone and lamp. Put all the books and other items on my bed and used furniture polish to clean the nightstand.

I then pulled it out from the wall and omg the dust and junk behind it! So I pulled it out further, vacuumed behind it, picked up all the random stuff, moved the cords away and pushed it back.

Now I am feeling overwhelmed so took a break. There is a ton of stuff on the floor around it but I will stay focused on my goal of a clear nightstand. There is a lot of stuff on my bed from this nightstand that I need to find a space for or delete from my life.

Today I also ran a couple errands, cooked, and took the box of donations including those 3 pairs of shoes to the charity store and I am SO GLAD those dumb shoes are gone and I cannot bring them back in the house!!!!!

That is interesting about the astronomical calendar and cross quarter. I certainly am on board for a new season with more light. That's what I need, too.

I got the fridge sorted and the going-bad stuff out to the trash. I asked Son to take out all the trashes in the house, plus some of the bagged leaves, so the bins are full to be taken by the truck. I think they do compost the leaves SubC, as long as we empty the bags into the green bin.

I am trying something new with my decluttering efforts. I woke up this morning and tried to "envision" where I want to have clear spaces tonight. I decided on my night stand that is next to my bed.

I wish I could take a photo before and after to share with you all. I know we talked about this like a year ago and some of you have a way to share photos. I did not figure it out but I will take a picture and if I can figure out how to share it I will.

The night stand surface is completely covered. There are papers and coins, lotions and chapsticks, pens and books and all sorts of random items that don't belong there. It is very dusty.

I can see having 2-3 books and a lamp and a few things I actually use in bed on there, or in the drawer.

I do have an alarm clock radio on there and I am thinking about getting rid of it but not sure. You can't get that quality anymore, it is all junk from china. It has a CD player and AM/FM radio, nightlight and alarms. I was using it mainly to listen to the radio at night. I was thinking about getting a new one but it is hard to find anything decent with AM radio. I use my phone for alarms now. I think I will clean it off and think about it. I wanted to find one with USB charger ports to charge my phone and kindle but can't find one reasonably priced with AM radio. I think the CD player is broken. Maybe I will try the CD player and if it is in fact broken, I might go ahead and get rid of it since it is big, and try to find a small AM radio with a charger port.

Thanks for letting me think out loud about this and process it. Feedback welcome!

I also will work on my kitchen counter/bar that looks like a landfill right now.

Jinx!! we posted at the same time SubC!

I am excited too! But also trying to figure out how to get the 375 bucks he is giving me for rent once he leaves. I had an actual renter before that but I really don't want another renter.

I guess I would have to give him notice since he is a renter, technically. I think I will let it go on for another 2-3 months and then ask him to get it all out so I can have the space back. Heck, he has a ton of heavy stuff in my garage that will make lots of space when he takes that. Plus company should be gone within this month and that will bring back TWO small rooms and my family room which is covered in their stuff and boxes. Really I just want ex to take his giant couch out of my family room or give me permission to donate it. But that's pointless until the company is gone.

Oh,

The candles -

Candlemas is a significant date in the Catholic Church. So that is CM's holiday.

The candles actually come from the pagan festival of Brigid who was changes to st. Brigid by the church. Brigid was celebrated on imbolc.

Imbolc means lambs milk and is a festival simply to mark to turn of the seasons. It is currently celebrated in some pagan religions which have fixed the date. Not always to the same day as Candlemas.

I do not follow the pagan calendar, I follow the astronomical one and the actual "cross quarter" - changing of season, is today, with the darkest 1/4 of the year ending locally at approximately 9:27 my time. So I will celebrate that by lighting my candles this evening. (Probably before that, but leave them burning.)

oh - also - I could legally throw out all the ex's stuff now. But he is paying rent on one room to keep some things here until he is more settled. And I need the rent money so that's okay for now. I think it will be all gone within a couple months.

What I could do is sort through his stuff in other parts of the house and put it all in that rented room. I started to do that but got overwhelmed, so as I sort I will go ahead and do that.

Today is my day off, although I may run a couple errands. I have to work tomorrow and Sunday.

It is trash pickup day so I will sort through the fridge and take out anything that is going bad.

Also already today I added 5 more things to my daily tally: 4 bottles of old pills and one sock with a hole in it! Gone forever!

So, all of the property is divided, so do you have to give him notice of abandoned property, or can you just start hauling all his stuff out?

An entire empty room!

I'm so excited for you!

I know you probably want to wait at least until the company is gone, but I would be so excited!

SubC and CM, I don't know anything about the candles and why you are lighting them. Is today or yesterday a significant date?

SubC no, it wasn't anything with the question, it was my brain that forgets! I forgot to answer you. Basically in a legal separation you are still technically married so you cannot re-marry and I personally would not date, either. Some people do date. Anyway the protection of a legal separation is now I am not liable for his debts. The judge ordered which debts and assets belong to each of us. He runs up massive debt so now I don't have to pay it (we live in a community property state so I would have had to). Also if he goes in a nursing home they can't come after me for the payments now (he is much older than me). But our marriage is over, he doesn't love me anymore and I think he had a side chick. And he was unkind to Teen. So I am glad he is gone. He can't come in my house, it was awarded to me, he has to pay child support for Teen. I could have just done a divorce but I was so upset and emotionally not ready for "another" divorce plus I am a rather new christian and don't know all the rules about when it is ok to divorce. But my pastor told me he would support a divorce in my case and I am free to remarry (no thanks tho).

You can ask me anything, I am pretty much an open book. If either ex or I want to be divorced we just have to file one paper to convert it to a divorce and either one of us can do that.

Good morning!

My cross quarter day will start right about the time of my first class today, but I will be home to light candles at the appropriate time this evening.

Planting some seeds today with my students.

Lila, I'm sorry if my question about your xdh and his stuff was out of line or pushy.

I really empathize with you about the jewelry, but unfortunately that means I am no help there. Honestly, it even bothers me to read that you threw away bubble wrap. (But keep posting such things!)

CM, I hope your trip goes well and that you enjoy your time with your cousins, even though it is a sad reason for gathering (a long life to celebrate though!)

I give my bunnies dried papaya to prevent wool block.

Just touching base and I'll do so again when I get home tomorrow afternoon or evening. I think I'm mentally prepared for the travel part. Sometimes it goes pretty well. It'll be my first time as I mentioned since that really stressful time last year when I wasn't feeling up to much in terms of travel.

The funeral itself will be a healing and bonding with family time. Some of the cousins I don't know if I'll see again for a long time because some of them live out of state and in recent times it's only been the funerals of my parents' generation that have brought us together, and he's the last one. We don't have reunions and stuff, and with me not liking travel... But be that as it may, I will be touched in my heart to be part of giving my beloved uncle a fitting sendoff.

I had wanted to go to Mass today before I ended up with the travel plans and so on. But it's okay, I remembered it is a special day anyway. 🕯 A candle for Candelmas. 😊

Must run down my checklist a bit more. We leave at 8:00. That's early in my book anymore! Bunny boy is doing fantastic. I'm so relieved. I think he and girl bunny groom each other and get a little hair ingested, so I'll brush them more to prevent it.

Saw the Daily Tally, and soon I will have some items to add to it. Everyone have a great day. 👍

Thanks SubC for the reminder to get my clothes out of the dryer. I hope they are not too wrinkled.

The necklace. That is a good suggestion that sets me into a panic thinking about it. Why is that? I don't even know. Here is my brain process.

I open the drawer and see all the jewelry and it is overwhelming.
I pick out one thing I have not worn in years.
"but my child gave this to me, I can't get rid of it"
"but I can save this for my granddaughters" (nice things for them to have, and junky things for them to wear as dress-up)
"but this probably cost $50+"
"but I don't remember who gave this to me, maybe it was someone I loved who is dead now and later I will remember they gave it to me and will cry tears of regret"

It is so hard to get rid of ANYTHING really.

I threw out some bubble wrap today even though I COULD USE IT SOMEDAY but I threw it out to count in the daily tally.

It is good progress Lila - 60%!

Imagine if you got rid of 60% of the stuff in your house!

Can you explain to me the difference between your separation and a divorce? If the separation does not end the marriage, will it be ended after a period of time? Or is that a different process? Mostly, I am thinking about the xh's stuff and when you can throw it out!

My sheets are in the dryer. I did chores and took a shower. And I had milk and eggs for dinner (which is supposed to be tomorrow's food - milk and eggs and hot or spicy things like tea, cinnamon, curry.)

Did you ever find that necklace? Could you go to the drawer with a donate bag and a trash bag and just start sorting through by removing things that aren't as important as the necklace?

I don't know how I can be this tired at 8:00

A small victory:

I was able to put 3 of the 5 pairs of shoes into the donate box along with some gloves, scarf, random items. I put the box in my car. I also threw out some worn clothing. I started my count in the Daily Tally thread. My goal is 1000 items gone by the end of this year and 22 items went out of my house today!

I know I said I would only keep 1 pair of the 5, but I have not yet decided which of the last 2 I might donate. So, it's progress.

hey you are doing good, SubC.

I made lunch for myself and my company, using things in the fridge that needed to be used up. I put my laundry in the dryer. I worked on my planner a bit.

That is as far as I have gotten today.

Before I went on my trip, I remember trying to gather things to pack and I could not find things I needed. I was getting so frustrated and angry, that I KNEW those things were in my bedroom somewhere, but they were basically lost under all the clutter. It made me so upset I was ready to get rid of everything! If I had had a big trash bin in my room I would have started tossing everything just to be able to find the things that matter. But I had to get ready to leave, so did not have time to declutter anything.

I am not sure how to channel that frustration into today, but yesterday I wanted to wear a certain necklace but there was so much stuff piled in the drawers that I could not find it. And once again I was mad, and ready to get rid of everything.

But right now the only thing I am motivated to do is sit here and wish for more snax.

So, my "spring clean and organize" today was trash and recycling out, stripped my bed and washed the sheets, took the ash bucket out and dumped it so I can clean out the woodstove before starting a fire tomorrow, took the compost out, and at school - inventoried the glaze and made a shopping list.

SubC, I am ready for spring, too. Enough is enough with the cold and dark. If I did not have roots and grands here, I would move to a warmer place.

Thank you for the badger. I will prioritize the shoes today. I worked from home for 3.5 hours, drank coffee, and put the bag of wilting spinach in a sink of cold water to get it washed and freshened. I'll saute it and maybe freeze half. I put in a load of wash.

I will try and get some items out of here for the Daily Tally thread... including those shoes.

Happy Groundhog Day!

And happy Candlemas to CM. I hope you bunny is ok.

Lila, a 12 hr day is ridiculous. I'm glad you took some of the time back.

And nice job getting rid of 280lbs of junk! Good day's work!

Here is a badger for the shoes:🦡

The cross quarter falls tomorrow night astronomically even though depending on your approach celebrations started last night at sundown. The darkest quarter of the year will be over. I'm definitely ready to turn my mind toward spring.

Traditionally I should be doing spring cleaning and decluttering today to prepare. I think the best I can manage is a load of dishes, but we shall see. Maybe I can manage at least a symbolic attempt. The snowdrops are blooming anyway. They don't allow human events to interfere.

I feel like I've been stalled for a long time.

CM - also, its hard when our beloved pets have health things going on. I hope your bunny will be okay. My elderly dog is also having troubles and I feel like I do not have the emotional space to cope with it. Praying our sweet animals will be okay.

I made some breakfast and am just having some time for me. I think I will try to get a few things done like pay bills and maybe finally try on those shoes and pick which pair to keep. At this point those darned shoes have become a symbol of my unwillingness to change. I want to beat this.

CM, I'm sorry for your loss. It seems rare to find someone aged 99 these days who is in lucid state. I visit a very nice man in a rest home who will be 100 in May and tells me lots of stories of growing up on a tobacco farm in SC (or was it NC?) I hope your trip goes well.

I think we can use the Daily Tally thread however works best for each of us. I plan to add by 'items' - whether donated or thrown out as long as it was not trash to begin with. For example if I clean my room I will count a blanket with holes that I was saving to use but throw out, but will not count a piece of junk mail. I want to keep a real tally so I know how many items left in one year.

SubC, I'm glad you had time with Bean. I had Tot and Acorn over last night and my son and dil came for dinner as well. It was a good visit. When the company moves out I will have space back to have Tot's play room again and will get a crib for Acorn to come spend the night too.

I was supposed to be at work at 8:30 this morning, meetings most of the day, program tonight and done around 8:30pm but I really needed a half day. So I called in that I would not make it this morning and I cancelled a frustrating meeting this afternoon. Now I can stay home and get a few things done. I just could not bear to go in.

I did get the separation finalized so add to my tally 280 pounds of frustration gone forever.

SubC, I know, right? Perspective is everything - I know oodles of people commute more than that, and in super busy places I can't even fathom, like New York City, LA, Tokyo, Hong Kong, Paris, London, and many more.

It's the speed, and the trapped feeling that get me. But I will try and feel you in solidarity with me. Anything positive is good.

My boy bunny last night was having some health issues - to be expected when he is 10 years and 5 months old (approximate - his actual birthdate is unknown). So I didn't get much sleep. Bunny boy is a little better but I'm going to have to keep watch on him. And I hope his condition won't cause anxiety when I have to entrust him to my roommate on Friday.

My life tends not to give me just one big emotional thing at a time. But I did a lot of praying.

CM, I am sorry about your uncle.

Also, please do not take this the wrong way, because I really do understand about your highway driving. Different things are hard for different people.

But when you said "road trip" and "< an hour" my brain was like "so, not quite my drive to work." That is only half highway time though. Maybe you can pass some of the time imagining you are coming to work with me.

Lila, thank you for the update on teen.

Saw Bean this evening. His daddy was cooked so I stopped by to play with him after work on my way to class. Gave dsil a chance to make dinner.

Sil and offspring left the house some time after I did this morning. Two beds to strip and wash, and a pile of towels on top of my washer.

Tired.

Cold.