Lila! Good to hear from you and that's cute about my multiple sets of fishes! A few years back I referenced a shut-in I used to cook for (several, actually) and I mistakenly said sh§t in and after that, we'd talk about how when we leave dishes in the sink, they're merely enjoying a little Sh§t in.

Your son is growing up to be a responsible, compassionate adult. You have done a great job raising him. I'm sorry about your daughter. Changing meds and staying on meds is so difficult for many. It is the easiest thing to do and the hardest.

Good that you could have people over for dinner! And I'm thankful you are returning the Fitbit. It's not working for you, and none of us needs more things that aren't working for us. We have plenty!

SubC, the squash biscuits sound wonderful. I love that you and your grandson have so many things that you enjoy doing together! Interesting comment about Future SubC. We should all keep in mind our Tomorrow Selves. I cannot think of an example off where waiting to do a chore was a good thing. And even if I could, they'd be few and far between.

I'm sorry, I have to log off sooner than anticipated. My friend is bringing us salads. And I'll need to start the cornbread. Road, I'm glad you stopped by. Never any pressure, merely a check-in!

Ah, hello people! I finally got my head together enough to pop my head in and say hi. February is my cryptonite.

Just typing that much caused me to pan around my room and take stock of things. Not looking too good in here... but I do see some stuff I can deal with today so I will. Start there,

I'm a genealogy buff and last night in the wee hours I had an obituary pop up for someone very significant. I couldn't believe my eyes. I've never seen it come up before. It's packed with info so even though it seems to align with everything I already know, I need to take an hour or so to really put it under the microscope and see what else I can pull from it. It sounds so boring when I type it out but for someone like me this is actually a big event. (I have a slightly deranged excited expression on my face btw) so I'm going to dive into that right now and then I will fold some laundry.

Hope to be back later with more,

P.s. tatoulia, thanks for checking on me earlier in the week and sorry to everyone for being out of the loop. I was slogging through some swampy sludgy foggy dearth o quicksand.

Actually, goats are a good reason TO exercise. They tend to require sudden bouts of exertion that can hurt you if you aren't in shape. I've been thinking lately that I need to add some weight training to my yoga. My shoulders are sore from yesterday.

Cleaning the yard is good exercise.

The squash is butternut. Bean and I grew a lot of it last year. I found a biscuit recipe - they are basically sweet potato biscuits with squash instead. I haven't tried it yet, but Bean and I both like to snack on biscuits, so I thought this would be a good idea.

Nice job on the dog toys! It's like getting free new toys!

I ended up doing two more of my habits last night, so I just skipped putting away the laundry again. That seems to be the only one I skip twice in a row. I am still doing it enough to not have baskets collecting in other rooms though.

I can't be lazy today or future Subclinical will have a hard week.

post 2 today -

hi SubC! The goats sound like good exercise, lol. I am interested in your squash biscuits! What kind of squash?

Today was exceptionally low key with a lot of sitting around, but I got a few things done. Cleaned up the kitchen to keep it nice. Worked on converting a huge file to PDF (been on the to do list for years, actually).

I hand sewed 7 dog toys that had ripped seams but were still in good condition, rather than buying new. Now I have them put back to bring out for the dog when he is bored.

I cleaned the pup's ears.

I also forgot to mention that yesterday I went outside and cleaned up some yard debris/dead leaves. It did not take a super long time but I am proud of myself for doing it. I also put windshield washer fluid in my car.

Posted below because my battery was dying. Plugged in now.

Lila, I think you are doing really well.

Those shoes are a challenge!

I'm glad you are getting time with tot. That matters more than most things.

And nice job on the return!

Try to focus on moving and eating healthy and don't worry about your weight. I hope things turn out the way you want with the counseling.

Ok, Off to make some quick progress and then bed!

Hi Lila!

I didn't do much on the accomplishment front today. I mostly rested.

I am struggling with a first fresher and it took an hour to milk her. It took another hour to clean up the disorder she caused in the barn kicking and fighting me (disorder might be too mild a word for a mess that required work gloves and a hammer.)

I have a plan for tomorrow that will hopefully help me avoid another round of intermediate goat wrestling.

I did ok with my habits list. It is up to 9 items and I have done six today. I anticipate doing at least a seventh before I go to bed. I am becoming comfortable with the idea that it is ok if I do them regularly and not daily - at least for now.

I also did a load of laundry, started the dishwasher, and baked some squash to mash tomorrow for biscuits. And my scullery sink is empty! (That is one of the habits now.)

hi everyone,

Tatoulia, you must stay! You give us hope. A bright light in the dark tunnel of clutter. Plus, when I was reading and catching up today, after reading about chickens and animals I got to your post about having "multiple, complete sets of fishes" and it took me a few minutes of very imaginative musing over what kinds of fishes you have that are in sets, before I recognized the typo! Made me smile today!

I have really struggled. I have been emotional this week for some reason, feeling a little overwhelmed with things to get done and concerned about my health which is not great and my weight that is not going down. Yet I am trying and I need to give myself credit for what I did this week.

- Cleared the mostly-cleared table so I could invite Tot and family over for dinner last night. Made dinner and enjoyed time with my family.

- Put on one of the multiple pairs of shoes without inserts, and walked around for awhile in them. My tendon started to hurt. I took them off. I like them and wonder if they will work when I lose weight... probably will end up keeping them as they are comfortable. Will try a different pair today.

- Bought and tried a Fitbt Sense for a week to see if it would give me any good data or help me improve my health. Several of the functions don't work well, one day I sat on the couch most of the day and it told me I walked over 5 miles (I totally did not). It does not count floors accurately. The snore detect just always says error. And my wrist started hurting after wearing it a few days. So I am processing a return, which costs nothing within 45 days. It is back in the box already.

- Filled out paperwork to get in to a counselor. I said I feel like I have no motivation, maybe an eating disorder or am using food to self medicate for possibly low level depression. I hope I get in and it is helpful.

My son cleaned the kitchen for me this week because it got so out of control it was terrible. I didn't ask him to, I just came home one day and it was clean. I am so blessed to have him.

My autistic teen is being very non compliant and it is exhausting. Running to doctors and counselors and fighting insurance and doing all in my power, and then when they prescribe a new med which teen agrees to, they get up in the morning and refuse to take it because they're "too tired." I wonder sometimes why I bother.

Husband went away for a couple days so I usually declutter his crap but I am so unmotivated. But I did do one thing:

- on trash day I went into his area and found about 8 empty boxes, flattened and consolidated them along with a plastic container and put it into the trash. I know I should recycle but this is the best I could do right now.

That is my update. Today is my day off, and I am staying home and will try to get a few things done.

Getting ready to head to a friend's house. Have a great day, everyone!

Slept ten hours last night.

Today is a catch up on things I haven't done day.

I'll report back when I have a sense of progress.

I hear the weariness in your voice and in the voices of teachers everywhere, SubC.

We have Monday off, and I'm pretty happy about that. It's 5 PM and Im about to make my combined dinner and lunch. I'm hungry. I'll visit a friend tomorrow and she is making me a salad and I'm so happy! My friend Emiko is coming over Sunday evening for dinner and bringing salads for us. I'll bake cornbread to accompany.

I took my garbage out this AM. I didn't get it out last night but it was gathered and ready to go, and my little friend had a clean littler box.

So now I'll make dinner and settle in to work some more.

Good morning!

Mr. kitty just learned to hunt Bean's matchbox cars. Now the white truck is under the couch. (Yes, I know Bean is too young for matchbox cars, but he loves them and we watch him when he has them. he does not try to eat the wheels or anything like that.)

My clothes do have places to go (although my closet is a mess) it's just taking the time to get them there. Time, time, time.

I got home from class at 9:30 last night. I was cold, and tired, and hungry. My youngest called with a car problem, I finished chores at 11. I left the eggs on the counter. I got almost six hours of sleep, and I need to go milk the goat in a few minutes. I am eating poundcake for breakfast because it is easy.

I will leave for school around 8. I have to fire the kiln, so probably home around 6:30. And then I will be exhausted, eat, do chores, waste time online, go to bed, and sleep too late tomorrow.

I think I need to start the dishwasher before I leave for school.

The administration put out surveys to staff and parents about relaxing covid restrictions. 8% of the parents and 4 teachers apparently said they would quit if we get rid of masks. I ran into the boss who I had a fall conflict with in the building yesterday after school, and she asked if I was one of the teachers. I was tired, so I said no and told her what my thoughts were. I wish I had been more alert and asked "why? Are you trying to figure out if they are expendable?" What is the point of an anonymous survey if you are going to try to out everybody?

Only 50% of staff responded by the original deadline. Here is what your survey is telling you - your staff is tired, overworked, and jaded. You are standing on the titanic asking if anyone would like a glass of ice water. We are drinking whiskey on the rocks and hoping a boat shows up. I know for a fact that some of our best staff submitted class proposals for 22-23 not based on "what can I fit into my schedule this year" but on "which classes require the least prep time and what is the minimum number of hours I can work next year before the income cut significantly affects my family?"

Good that you can go to school and that husband's fever broke. I think keeping up with laundry is more important than the folding and putting away. I learned to fold and put away from Tillie. I still have days where I put on chair and let cleaning ladies fold. The thing that has been most helpful is reducing my things, so they have a place to go. So this will all come in time, SubC.

I'm glad to hear you also talk to yourself with pep talks. I tell myself, it takes exactly two minutes to empty the dishwasher each AM. That's all. Again, back when I had multiple, complete sets of fishes, I couldn't put them all away, so I'd put it off, which meant I had tons of dirty dishes in sink. Tillie got me here. The logic is airtight but I couldn't see it.

Dh fever broke and he tested negative! 😁

His immune system is complete crap, so it has been a little stressful living with him.

I can't go see Bean after school today because he has play dates this weekend and Dd doesn't want to taje even a little risk.

Dh had a headache and a fever of 102 last night.

He is going to use a home covid test this morning. If he tests negative, I get to go to school. If he tests positive I am out for at least 7 days. Right now he is sleeping.

I really hope I don't have to miss school!

CM, I also hope your roommate gets to go on her trip! It is so great that you are quilting again! And that those blocks found a better home - it's always good when we can increase the total happiness in the world.

Tatoulia, I do a lot of talking to myself about my daily habits (well, some of them aren't daily - like yesterday was not a yoga day - I don't have time) about a lot of things I am trying to do. It seems like I feel tired and unmotivated a lot. So I say things like "don't leave the eggs on the counter - this will take ten minutes. Future [Subclinical] will thank you." I do a lot of trying to take care of my future self.

Some of my habits I'm trying to be gentle with myself about - like putting away all of the clean laundry every day. I found myself reluctant to run a load because I didn't want to have to put it away that evening, and I decided that was a step backwards. So my new habit is to see how many days I can put the clean laundry away, not let it pile up, and reduce the number of days it waits. So last night, when Dh didn't feel well, I left the clean laundry in the dryer so I wouldn't bother him putting it away.

Sometimes, when I am in the barn doing chores - the bare minimum - I think, ok, this is overwhelming, but you can do one thing - put something in the trash, stack some flowerpots, clean a surface, literally take five minutes.. It is still a disaster from all the things Dh tossed in there from the garage, the goats getting loose twice, and loose chickens - who poop everywhere. But it is now a disaster with paths and space to walk safely and a clean milk stand. And I repenned most of the chickens. Maybe this weekend I will catch and restrain the last few roosters.

I think my new fence is done! The big equipment was gone when I got home last night, but it was too dark to look things over. Now it is dark and raining. I know the last thing they were going to do was hang the gates and at least one is up. Depending on the weather, I could move my boys before March! I am starting to think about spring and feel hopeful.

CM, I love hearing about your quilting! Yay for passing along some fabric to a fellow quilter. It is a very satisfying feeling to be able to do that! If you feel like it, I would love to see some of your quilting on Etsy. No pressure, only if it is convenient and fun for you.

I hope your roommate can get out of town. Will be a good break for both of you!

Can't believe we have yet another big winter storm on the way here. Thanks a lot, Colorado. Really, you could keep your snow to yourselves for the ski slopes. 😒

Seems like they tend to come on Thursdays. At least they are shorter duration. Last year in February we got a period of bitter cold that lasted many days. 🥶

So I'm complaining, but not as much, haha.

Got kind of stressed yesterday and this morning was hit with a very sudden onset migraine. Rested most of the day. Yesterday I had been deciding on fabrics from my stash for the quilt. About settled but questioning one or two whether they harmonize with the rest. May switch out for others. Then I will start cutting.

Had been going to tackle the rest of my "nest" on the sofa, as it was starting to grow back after I subdued it the other day. Maybe tomorrow.

These days are treading water kind of days. If the snow melts it looks like my roommate will still go out of town this weekend. If so, I'll get some quilt progress made because I'll be able to use the kitchen table for cutting and set up the ironing board because a few of the fabrics need a bit of pressing before being cut.

Can't remember if I put my other quilt on Instagram. I'll check. And when this one gets assembled I'll put it up too.

A cool thing happened yesterday re quilting - I mentioned to one of the gals about these preprinted blocks I had been trying to make a quilt around before but had given up on because they were crooked. Well, I had them with me and she looked at them and said she thought she had an idea - so I gave them to her! 😀 She is a confident quilter with years of experience. You all can appreciate how good that feels, to pass along something that wasn't working for me to someone who can put it to use. So freeing. Maybe I can remember to look for more ways to do that with things that are not sparking joy.

I had a friend who used to say, upon walking into a room, what one little thing can I do to improve it? I have been doing something similar for a while. When I walk out of a room, I look to see if there's something I can take out and out in its proper place. So if I'm leaving the living space for the bathroom, I check to see if there's a coffee cup I can put in the dishwasher as I pass the kitchen. I still have to think the words but I do think them automatically. I still have to think the words when I start to put something in a "way station," such as don't put those there, carry on to the linen closet. It is really helpful.

Do any of you have a little conversation with yourself to do something properly or to build a habit?

I love AA. And so I will be here! I have been thinking about this and wanted feedback. I have four of each towel size. I have three sets of sheets. I no longer have six or seven comforters for my bedroom. Etc, etc. I have rethought how to love my things. A total work in progress but it's in my mind and I feel satisfied. I no longer have the clangs and clatter and other unpleasant noises from stuff everywhere. I can love something now, or in the past, without being stuck for the rest of my life. I can look at things when shopping and say, I love that table but don't have any room for it.

I don't think I'm being hasty in feeling that I've arrived. I've been able to do this for a while.

I am here! And I'm here for you! And me! And it's still the most satisfying feeling to take my garbage and recycling out!

Cleaners came and went during my meeting. Now they are at mom's.

You must stay!

We need your support and inspiration!

You can be our sponsor (yes, I have family in AA)

Good morning! Coffee clinks!

Thank you for your support, SubC. I went from over $50k in credit card debt, a mortgage and a small personal loan of $10k to no debt, no mortgage, and a healthy savings account. From a filthy house with too much stuff to a clean, maintained living space.

I do realize that with the no spend situation, I'm not bringing anything in. I look around and there really aren't any categories of things to get rid of. There aren't even any individual items. The cleanout with my friend last summer was a complete, every drawer and every closet and every cabinet clean out. So now I'm looking around and there isn't anything left. I'm not just saying that. I have six of each flatware, four of each regular dinnerware, etc. I won't be splitting up my mother's china. I don't even have that many sentimental things. I have plenty, but Ive changed my view on what constitutes a sentimental thing. So we shall see as I settle into month two of not spending.

I figure I will have my choice of clothes by this summer by keeping up with the dieting. So that needs to be where I concentrate my efforts.

Naturally living hoard-free means I have to be vigilant. I'm now three or four years into having housecleaners. Can you believe it?

So I'll stay vigilant and I'm not giving up on looking to reduce, I am ready to acknowledge that I'm in a much better place and I'm maintaining. My mindset shifted a long time ago. I have been maintaining for longer than I realize. Yesterday at CVS they had their free beauty bag and I looked at what was in it and it all intrigued me, including the bag, and I put it back down. It was free. And with no pain and regret, I thought, I'm good.

I've considered whether I should stay on here. I am intrigued by the decluttering your waistline thread. I love you all madly.

Good morning!

Tatoulia, thank you for checking on road!

I am laughing that you are not making progress on anything but your finances and your weight. Think about that - two major areas in your life that have gotten better in the last six weeks! You only have so much energy - give yourself credit!

CM, I'm sorry the library was disappointing. It's great that the quilt is still moving though! And clean gutters. Clean gutters will help keep other problems from happening.

I am still working on hard main goals and new habits. I got half my seeds ordered yesterday (see me leave out the word "only"?)

I went to bed last night feeling very discouraged - thinking about how my day had produced laundry and garbage and recycling and dishes and that my boss added a task to my list and I didn't work on school stuff or clean any part of the house or barns. The only part I broke even on was dishes.

But the seeds are a big deal. And my habits are a good foundation. I'll take recycling and garbage today. And I'll do some laundry.

Glad to hear that Jerry is turning out to be reliable. Now to find a sewer person, CM! It's a start.

I'm not making much progress. Y friend is coming Wednesday afternoon to help with the chairs. I've had the fabric for a while. Normally I do them myself but this had a stripe and I will need a more precise hand and eye. How I envy your quilting, CM. and Road's embroidery. And your pottery, SubC.

Bf and I didn't celebrate Valentine's Day as we are not ready to be in a restaurant. And he had a mix-up on my flowers, and he felt badly. My birthday is three weeks away. I am absolutely fine with how today was a series of mix ups. I told him to concentrate on my birthday. Oh! And I'll order my birthday cake soon. I may order two, since I'll want one for when I celebrate with mom. I prefer to get my own cake. At my surprise 50th I brought my own. And guess what? The bakery gave me the wrong cake! And it was a non-event. We just served it up with the three kinds of ice cream and it tasted so good.

Okay, off to do other things. Maybe go to bed.

I'm making no progress except financially. No spend continues. And I'm finally working on myself physically and have lost two lbs. my weigh ins are Monday mornings. So those things show progress.

Happy Valentine's Day 💘

I'm typing this at the library branch that reopened. I'm sorry to say I'm rather disappointed in version 2.0. It's more echo-ey and just not set up well for an introvert who likes to come to a quiet library. Everything happening everywhere is audible pretty much everywhere, whether it's the children in their section or adults who don't use quiet voices. But perhaps it'll improve if I can figure out the best times to come. Daytime business hours certainly aren't it, at least not during tax season. There were AARP people doing people's taxes and talking. I walked around looking for quiet study rooms and found none save for the ones occupied by the AARP people.

If this doesn't work out, there are still the other branches I have had moderately decent luck with; I was just hopeful because this is closer to where I live.

Sigh.

Tomorrow I hope to resume progress on my quilt at church. The weekend was a bust for that, and it made me bummed out for awhile. Went to my storage unit and pulled out a few more fabrics that might work in it. So much stash. But I have a plan, for when I get done with these current couple of quilts which are built around printed/embroidered blocks and are more elaborate.

That plan is, I'm just going to start making scrappy blocks with all kinds of stash, and then when I get a certain number, like a dozen, decide on a way to make them into a quilt, with sashing and borders etc. Just churn 'em out one after another.

Today my roommate had Larry, the handyman referred from the senior center, to clean the gutters and he also gave her some leads on storm windows. Though of course the sewer line must come first. I am hoping this handyman pool from the senior center may still lead to some referral for that. It's such an uphill climb, especially the finances. Is it any wonder we buy a lottery ticket now and then...

But at least that's some better progress than being completely stalled out.

Since I couldn't focus much here, I did do some downloading of research articles to my flash drive, which I can do quickly without needing my high level concentration.

This is sort of the approach to life I've had to take for some years now - very piecemeal but trying to believe that at some point it will begin to come together into finished projects that I've dreamed of. Including a decluttered existence. That project is a big one indeed.

Road is doing fine. She's taking some time to regather and recalibrate!

Happy Valentine's Day!

I miss Tillie. I pretend she's with Nate and Mrs Nate.

I'll check in on Road via Instagram.

Happy Valentine's Day!

Sending love out to you all.

The moon was beautiful when I got up this morning, which always makes me think of tillie.

I am worried about road.

Today is a Bean day, so I get to spend Valentine's Day with two of my loves. (Dh is still working from home.)

Today's big goal is finish the seed order. I have some smaller goals as opportunities arise.

The days are getting longer. We are halfway through February. Mr. kitty says this snow nonsense is ridiculous.

What a sweet tradition, SubC. And I like the work your plan advice. Good to hear you had a nice time at the concert.

I'm a slug on the weekends. Nothing to show for my time.

I have my seed order as done as I can get it right now. I need to call the seed companies and ask a couple of questions before I finalize it.

Today was my grandfather's birthday. He would have been 105 years old.

Every year on his birthday I cut Willow starts. And every year I cut too many, and they don't get planted and they get knocked over on the pitch, and the rot, and they overgrown their energy, and they mostly die.

He used to say "plan your work, and work your plan." So tonight, I went out and I cut six starts. Just six. I can pot up six little trees when they start to grow roots. I can keep six little trees watered. I can find spots for six little trees. Maybe next year I'll do 8.

Pound cake in the oven, laundry well underway.

Good morning.

The concert was excellent.

Dinner was also good. Yummy food and we were seated in a little booth tucked in a corner like an afterthought well away from other tables. I brought half my meal home for tonight.

I was pretty lazy yesterday, but I ran the dishwasher and a load of laundry and found all my garden materials and sorted them out.

My main hail for today is to finish the seed order.

I also want to make another pound cake and run another load of laundry - those will interweave.

Beyond that I do not know. I am a Super Bowl agnostic.

Okay I wrote out my checks, dropped off mom's groceries, then went for a walk. It was good to be out. It helped me see how out of shape I am.

I have to do better.

I am getting rid of the shirt I wore today and the bra. Neither are doing me any favors. After my walk, I did two loads of laundry and showered. Even though it's super early by my standards, I think I'll go into bed now. I stated a new book on my kindle today.