Lila, sorry about your dog. One of my bunnies is 12-1/2 and since New Year's has gotten more frail and has a crippled hind leg. But he's holding his own for now and I have some things to help him. Still, when they get up there, every day with them must be looked upon as a blessing.

SubC, we had crazy little bit of everything kind of weather this week too. Finally settling down. Ash Wednesday and Lent are here - I had gotten mixed up somehow and thought it wasn't till the 15th but I should've questioned that...

Roommate has cleared some shelf space that I need to make use of. Need to dust it first.

I'm in a bit of irony, and I'm sure I'm not alone - right now there have to be thousands of other crafty people especially seamstress types who mourn the closing of Joann Fabrics due to bankruptcy. I had been doing really well with the not having scarcity mentality re fabric, ribbon, etc. BECAUSE I WOULD TELL MYSELF IT WOULD ALWAYS BE AVAILABLE and easily accessed so no need to buy more. But now?

And of course I do plan to "shop my stash," that's not the problem. But I have to say it feels weird to have so few places that stock that category of merchandise. There had been other locally owned fabric stores close in the past 2-3 years too. It almost begins to feel like the hoarders of fabric were prescient after all. Sigh...

I don't plan to be foolish about any of this and go on an acquisition binge or anything, but again the irony is strong.

Lila, I'm here. I'm thinking of you today.

I haven't been posting because I'm mostly just trying to keep my head above water this week. I volunteered to do too many things and I'm taking another pottery class that starts tomorrow night and I'm not ready for. I've also got a tax situation I need to address tomorrow when I can be on the phone during business hours. If anybody answers the phone...

Where is everybody?

I hope you all are doing well.

I have been working but coming home to be with my dog. He was fairly happy although tired but today he has been a little worse, and I am talking to my son about it being his time to go. This is devastating and makes me physically ill, but I am not going to let him suffer. So it will be soon. Probably tomorrow but I need to make sure my son can be here and my grandkids are not here. This is terribly hard.

I feel exhausted and it is hard to get anything done. I know things will be different. I will have a lot of time and will be getting rid of a lot of things soon. It feels like a nightmare, though. I am going on a staff retreat this weekend which will be a good way to step out of this house of grief.

Lila, I'm really sorry about your dog. I hope your family will be able to be sone comfort to you.

It got very cold here again. I've been working on getting ready for my ducklings. Also starting to change my email because the new internet is in and the old one leaves at the end of March. And doing some long term farm planning with Dh, which somehow always ends up stressful and exhausting. But we are working on good things.

The sun has been coming and going today.

hi SubC, sorry you have been here all lonely, but it is nice to catch up and read about your hailducks and they nice sorter your husband brought you. Yes, my first husband and I had a herd of dairy cows. If I remember correctly, about 60 of them. We had a milking barn with the machines hanging down from the ceiling into stalls, and we would bring in a group of cows, feed and milk them, then go to the next group. It took forever and what I hated was when you had the cow teats all cleaned off and the machine ready to put on them, or on them, and they kicked it off into the dirt. omg so frustrating! Glad I am not doing that anymore.

I was working a lot this week as well as recovering from the flu lingering symptoms and one night of vomiting. Then I took my dog to the vet a few hours away. You might remember he has had some health scares and a surgery. Well this time we found out he has a very aggressive and advanced cancer. There is not much anyone can do. He is only 4 so it is a shock. He is not in pain and has days or a few weeks max left. They increased his steroids to help with symptoms. He seems happy, just tired, but knowing his days are so very limited, has broken my heart. I am taking as much time this week to be with him at home as I can.

I think the trauma of it has numbed me somewhat. I don't remember who said it, either here or maybe on tv or at church, that when they had a big trauma, the only way they could cope with those intense feelings was to walk. She walked and walked and walked. I think she lost like 80 pounds as a side effect, not a goal. And I was so upset yesterday, that I went out of the vet hospital (he was still there recovering) and I walked until I could barely breathe, which is not far. But it helped. And today I just started cleaning things, same principle, pouring that emotion and energy into something physical so the pain could leak out and the stress could be relieved. I swept off the whole deck, I cleaned the toilet, and gathered laundry and trash. I feel so helpless and upset, and I know the alternative/usual behavior is to freeze. To sit and eat and eat and do nothing, just stew in my stress and sadness. But my stress and sadness over this is too much to sit in. I think I might die of the stress and sadness if I did that, so I am just going to walk and clean until I am exhausted, and spent time with my beloved dog. What else can I do? Pray a lot.

Nothing else seems important now, and I expect once he is gone I will just pour myself into my work, because coming home and not having him smiling and wagging his tail to greet me seems overwhelming. I don't have anything else. I mean I can spend time with my grandkids sometimes, but they have their own life.

Sorry for the downer. I can't talk about it yet anywhere else.

Well, it's the subc show today!

My weather was all over the place - light rain, clouds, bright sun, 1cm hail, assorted hail up to the size of a quarter, down pours - all more than once (except the hail, that was two separate sustained periods) and mixed all around in order. The ducks actually rushed out of the barn to play in the smaller hail storm and didn't come in until it was over! Ducks are weird!

I got 1/4 of the garden tarped, a feed bag full of trash (torn pieces of tarp, feed bags that didn't work as path mulch, old plant tags, twine.) cleaned up out of the garden, a stall cleaned out, a new chicken pen set up, and one group of chickens moved. Now I have to take the chicken pen they were in apart, clean that stall, and have it ready for the ducks and chicks that could arrive as early as Tuesday!

After I finish my tea, I plan to finish cleaning off the counter of doom (it's a parking spot. It will never STAY clean, it just needs to be cleared regularly - like the dining table , the kitchen counters, the sinks, the laundry basket..) and call it a night.

Very slow morning!

I have a lot of tasks I want to have done, but I am reminding myself that this is a recovery day. Didn't get to bed until almost midnight, but slept until nearly seven.

The weather is supposed to be cloudy today with a little rain in the afternoon, but warmer, so my plan is to get outside once I get moving. I have a lot to do in the barn to be ready for my poultry next week.

Yesterday I got ready for school, picked up my book at the post office (won't fit in the mailbox and the driver won't try my driveway in it's current condition) taught, hit the "off site storage" (thrift craft store)for $2 worth of paintbrushes for school, stopped at the studio for materials for the school wide project I volunteered to run next week (because I'm crazy - let's see, chicks hatching (hopefully), ducks and geese coming in the mail, registration happening with extra parent emails, my friend's play to attend on the far side of the city, a class I'm taking starting..yeah, I'll run a school wide project that week.) and babysat for Bean and Buddy.

Dd and dsil wanted to stay out after their concert, so heartdaughter's wife (who is a night owl and lives less than a mile away) came over to be in the house with the sleeping boys until they got home so I could get home and do chores before midnight. She told me she and heartdaughter are planning to move! I know they want a bigger house (theirs is tiny) but I want them to stay close. They are currently looking half an hour by car in the wrong direction! Also, heartgrandson has two more years of high school. They should wait.

Good morning!

Really Lila? Were they your cows? I hope you feel better soon. I am finally - after 5 weeks! Basically better. I just have a slight sniffle like an allergy with a very occasional throat clearing cough. I don't notice it when I am involved in something.

I did not make food or eat the cake. I decided I wasn't that hungry and food was too much work. I also didn't get to bed early because Dh got home late and is working on a project that makes a lot of noise. I read and wandered around the house doing light tidying. And I only "slept in" to 5:30 because Dh got up to go work out - his alarm went off and he turned the light on. But I have been sitting quietly on the couch having my coffee and reading online. - weather, a tiny dose of news, blogs, here and another chat group.

Just my own chores and school prep to do this morning.

I have to tell you, I have definitely been doing well with the stuff! Dh came home last night with a sturdy 8 section metal paper sorter. He said "this was in the trash at work, and it looked like something you would want." I was actually wishing for something like this the other day, but now I can't remember what I was working on. I'm sure it will come to me though! I am keeping the paper sorter. Dh has NEVER brought me trash from work before! - well, when the kids were little, he brought giant printouts for them to color on the back of, but this is very different.

hello! Nice reading and catching up with all 3 of you. Yes, good luck with your pickleball, CM! Sounds fun!

Tatoulia, my exhusband had that issue as well and it drove me crazy. He rarely cleaned, but when he did, it was 90% maybe. Like, clear and wipe off the table but leave dirty napkins on it. Put all the dirty dishes in the dishwasher but leave chunks of food in the sink. Load the dishwasher but not turn it on. I always thought it was something subconscious in him, but I don't know what. It seems like a good thing to work on!

SubC, I used to milk cows with a machine. It was a pain.

I am still sick but worked from home today and I am exhausted and missing a meeting I was supposed to be at. I am coughing a lot. I wanted to work on my bedroom today, but I spent most of my time actually working, and some time with my dog. I am tired.

CM, Good luck with your pickleball!

Tatoulia, the thing that always drove me crazy about the lists was that I would work all day to cross the things off, and then they would just appear again the next day. The row of stickers feels more like I have really done something.

I am tired. This morning right before I milked, I broke the milking machine. Then the cows spent twenty minutes watching me fix it like MacGiver, using only my pottery tools and a pair of tweezers. I still managed to do a good job milking, wash the machine, and get home in time for a shower before work. By the time I was done, I felt like I could do anything!

I had a really good day at school. But I have been running on adrenaline all day. I checked some work after school, stopped for a few groceries, and started a load of laundry as soon as I walked in. Now it is getting dark, I have had a snack because I was too hungry to contemplate dinner, and I need to do chores and maybe make some food before I crash. Or possibly I will do chores, eat the last piece of chocolate cake and go to bed early.

This is going to have to be quick again but maybe I can expand, or expound, later.

Weather here is a vast improvement over last week.

That means, though, that there's a feeling of having emerged from a time warp and now spring is coming and it's hard to catch up.

But I know exercising paradoxically will help me have more energy and clarity for all of it, and I'm actually hoping soon to start playing casual pickleball at the senior center. First I need to buy some shoes with support and learn the rules and scoring. But I watched people play yesterday and spoke with a few and I believe they will be helpful and welcoming to a newbie. Stay tuned.

That's great that the sticker system works for you! I'm trying to make more lists because crossing things off does a lot for me. Seeing that I've done something is a big motivation.

Like you, I've got to. leave for work and cross a few things off if the work list!!

Good morning!

Hi Tatoulia! I'm glad to see you! Good job on finishing your tasks! I struggle with the "I'll do it later"s a lot.

Did I tell you guys about my habit tracker? It's a silly "workbook" where I give myself stickers (I have a lot of stickers) for things like keeping up with the dishes and laundry. It has helped with not leaving baskets of laundry around because I don't get a sticker if the load isn't as finished as it can be (some nights the dryer is running when I go to bed, but that load has to be put away the next day or no sticker.) I have special butterfly stickers for days when a job doesn't need to be done so I don't want to do silly things like wash one shirt just for the sticker. It makes me feel good to look back on my week and see that I really have accomplished a lot - I can't remember who said "housework is a job nobody notices unless you don't do it."

Had a good day with my boys yesterday. Used up a gift card to buy Bean a breakfast treat.

The cows went ok last night. I don't like the milking machine. It takes too long to wash and washing things is not my favorite job.

I'm a little stressed about the time with getting to school this morning, so must get going!

Ladies, I've so enjoyed reading your conversations! I learned alot from both of you!

I've been okay for the most part. I think I mentioned that I am changing my mindset. I tend to almost finish something and decide I can do it later. Example: make my bed but leave the pillows askew. Do the dishes but leave one glass in the sink. That sort of thing. So now the second my mind says, I'll do that later, I now force myself to do it. It's not automatic yet but what a difference. Last night I cleaned one cat's box and thought, oh I'll do the other one later. WHAT?! I have my rubber gloves on, a mask on, the cat box liners out, the litter out but I'll save the other one for later? so I'm actively working on this and it's making a big difference for a few more seconds.

So that's it for me. I haven't been doing much of anything. Working and sleeping. I'll need to get my act together.

Thanks Lila. hope you find your cord.

I'm sore from throwing and from a negligible amount of outside work I did yesterday. (Mostly the throwing I think) but I did yoga. And today I got through the whole yoga set without coughing!

I've got chores and some quick tidying to do before I go to get the boys, but my morning is off to a good start.

Hope things are going well for everyone else.

Hey that's good work on the glaze, SubC! I am proud of you for doing that!

Apparently someone misplaced the cord to my laptop that I need to use at an event in the morning. I doubt the laptop is charged, and am not sure what to do except go in extra early and look for it. I hope I can find it!

Today was mostly relaxing, but I did wash a load of clothes (which are still downstairs - I need to get them put away) and spent time with Tot and my dog. And watched the last few episodes of Alone (in Tasmania) which I enjoyed. Now I am making some spaghetti and (frozen, plant based) meatballs for my dinner. Trying to use up what's in the freezer, which includes a bag of homemade from scratch fresh tomato, garlic, basil sauce.

Popping in to share another little success. Remember when I bought the stuff to rehydrate my glazes and I was going to rehydrate all the glazes and rinse out the jars and recycle them?

I kind of crashed and burned on that.

But tonight I wanted a brown glaze that I am out of.
I could:
1) Order it online
2) Go to the pottery shop after school on Tuesday and buy it
3) Take the project in to school and use the school brown the next time somebody needs a technique review (the spot I want to glaze brown is small)
Or
4) spend twenty minutes rummaging around in my studio until I have found both the rehydration mix and the three jars of dried up brown, combine the two most dried up jars, and leave the dry glaze to soak up the solution overnight before stirring it tomorrow.

I did #4

I think I will have over 2/3 of a jar when it is all remixed. Since glaze is over $14 a jar, that's good use of time.

Plus it gets at least one jar out of my studio when I go back and wash it out (too tired tonight) and avoids adding a new jar.

I dry them crunchy - I like crunchy.

I think your art project sounds fantastic! You may find you enjoy it so much you want to work on it every day!

I'm sorry about your dog, but glad he is better again.

Mr. Kitty's head is still healing slowly from his abscess in December!

Today was really good - mostly because it is sunny. I didn't do any big decluttering, but I got my first tray of seeds started for the garden (that's a bigger job than it sounds like- it's a big tray - all the varieties of peppers, Brussels sprouts, scallions, and ground cherries.

I spent about two hours working in my pottery studio, cleaned up a little, threw for a while, and wedged more clay than I used.

And I got exercise, made good food choices, and have been keeping up with the house!

Tomorrow will be really full because I have my boys and then I need to go milk cows for my farm sitter.

SubC, I did cherry tomatoes in the dehydrator this summer! Some of them are heirloom ones, from the neighbor. I have maybe 2 pint jars of them. I will get them out and start eating them. The green beans sound good too. By the way, how dry do you make your cherry tomatoes? Like hard and crunchy? Or chewy like raisins? Mine are more hard which makes them harder to eat, but I was worried if I left them moist and sticking together they would mold.

I'm glad you are feeling better. I am too, and I must go to work tomorrow. I am super exhausted and still have a bit of cough but that is almost gone.

Your journal sounds really fun and interesting! I am not very creative, so maybe I will do a weekly trash journal, where I throw a bunch of items of various colors and textures in an open trash can, admire the random patterns it creates, and then throw it out.

Today is my last rest day and also a day I need to get some things done for work. My dog has had a relapse, so that required treatment and was exhausting, but he is happy now and doing well for the moment. Hoping to build up my stamina and start decluttering and cleaning on a regular basis.

Good morning!

Yes, I make the veggies in my dehydrator. Green beans and dried cherry tomatoes. One year I did some squash chips, but I didn't like them. I've done kale chips as well, but they are too messy to eat in the car.

I'm sorry about your flu! About all you can do is eat fruits and veggies, exercise, sleep, wash your hands, and get your shots. My personal addendums are fresh air, dirt, and a multivitamin for old ladies.

I am still in "mostly keeping up" mode, not making any forward progress, but not really losing ground. The effects of Covid are still lingering, but manageable. The cough comes and goes, the exhaustion sneaks upon me, chocolate tastes good again. I'm not sure that last one is helpful, as the one gift being sick brought was help with my weight loss goals.

I am also starting to get my creative energy back. I still have a bunch of books in my cart at the online used book store, but I'm not in a hurry to order them. I was able to pick up my library books (all but one) on my my way home yesterday. They are mostly about art and book making/altered books, and one is a really good book I read about SAD years ago. I remembered that it had a diet that I tried for a while that seemed to help with the afternoon slumps and wanted to revisit it. It also had a lot of good tips on timing exercise and light and getting outdoors and some general encouragement.

Mostly my decluttering is focused on using up a bit at a time.
Lotion, pantry, paper and craft materials, seeds. I bought seed starting mix yesterday to get started on my garden this week. I'm planning to try a daily collage page junk/art journal in March. I'm trying to decide what size the pages will be. I'm going to create them all first, and then bind them somehow. (So I guess in March/April I'll be adding one journal to my items) the "rules" are I have to use writing instruments/paper/card stock/base materials I already have and I will add multimedia ephemera and written lines from my day. The only thing I can buy is adhesive, and only if none of my existing adhesive works - which would mean something is dried up or empty and must be discarded.

Ok, lots to do today, starting with yoga, chores, and going to my friend's house to learn how to milk her cows using her milking machine - which I will be doing a few days next week.

SubC, what kind of dried vegetables do you carry? Do you make them in your dehydrator?

On Monday I came down sick with the flu, and have spent 2 days shivering and sleeping with a fever. Such misery. Today I was able to be up all day so far, not doing much, but the fever is gone so I am just not quite as miserable. Boy do I need to build up my immune system somehow.

I think carrying the protein bars is an excellent idea! They've got to be better for you that fast food, and definitely cheaper because you already bought them. They are ultraprocessed though, so maybe slowly switch to something else - I carry nuts, apples, and/or dried veggies.

I cleared the counter of doom both days this weekend! (Although the box of items from pre-Christmas is still in the cupboard, I need to start working on that.)

I slept my usual seven hours last night and woke up before my alarm. I was up for almost 45 minutes before coughing! Maybe I am finally at the end of this.

We had a bad ice and snow storm yesterday and well into the night. Dh is about to try to go to the gym and let me know if I will be able to get my boys this morning. The schools are already closed, so we can't tell how bad the roads are. the biggest concern is our driveway.

ohhh SubC, you are so right about us both running away! How insightful. Neither one of us wants to emotionally hurt the other. We are both very careful about that. I have often thought that she and I are very opposite, but in fact, we are more alike that I imagined! I will think about ways to negotiate like what you said about the shelves.

I like your lotion idea! That is very cool. Maybe I should do that with my protein bars - put one on my desk and one in my purse so that when I am hungry, I eat it instead of buying something or going to a drive thru or making something new. I truly regret buying all those bars. I bought probably 20 boxes of them a few months ago when I saw online reviews about how good they are, how they taste like candy but are low sugar, and I thought, "hey! If I eat one of these for lunch with a bottle of water, I would lose weight!" But then who wants a "candy bar" as their lunch with nothing else? So they sit. But they really are good and I will start using them, as I am going to try counting calories here soon. I also wrapped one box and gave them to one of my sons for his birthday, lol.

I went to church and am tired today. Tomorrow is a paid holiday. I have very low stamina from being so sick and inactive for weeks. I am hoping the weather will clear up so I can start taking short walks with my dog. It is too icy now. My balance is poor, so it is not safe for me to walk until the ice melts. Also, I hate being cold. I am fine walking when it is over 40 degrees, though.

I have done nothing else today but watch tv and read and eat.

And then today on YouTube I encountered the concept of "project pan" which is basically about using up your make up - including/starting with the good stuff instead of buying more, and paying attention to how long it takes you to use it up so you don't overbuy things when they are on sale.

I don't wear make up, but this ties into my lotion.

Also, yarn, art supplies, fabric, pottery embellishments, snacks, baking supplies, soap, socks, seeds...

I went "shopping" for books in the library catalog. I have seven on hold. Five are available and will be put on the pick up shelf at my closest branch for me. Two I have to wait until someone else is done.

Good morning!

Lila, - you and your ddil both respond to conflict by running away! She withdraws by hiding in her room, and you withdraw by moving your stuff. No wonder the two of you haven't worked any of this out - there's nobody at the negotiating table.

Definitely get the bolt.

Also, maybe start small with "bring up the issues" like, asking ddil or tot to help you for a few minutes when you are cleaning off the table or wiping up the floor, or "hey, I'm going to clear this shelf off so I can put my tea and protein bars in here out of the kids reach. Where would you like the (whatever is in there)"

About packing to move - maybe. For example - if you pack up your dishes, there should still be enough dishes for everyone to eat, fewer to pile up dirty, less to store in the kitchen, and no more worries about them getting broken. But, be sure you are packing things you will need when you move but don't need now, not just things you don't need now - a lot of that second category is probably things you don't need at all. Also, if you pack up teen's things - don't move them to your new house. She can get them from her brother.

Also, a thought about storage - my ddil is very smart. Birdy is very active and mobile. He is clever with objects - like his daddy who figured out plastic drawer latches at about 15 months. So instead of installing them, she took everything out of the lower drawers in the bathroom, filled them with towels, and put the things from the drawers in boxes up high in the closet where the towels used to be. Meds are in childproof containers in a box with a latch. She is on the lookout for one with a combination lock. Birdy can't reach the shelf over the bar in his own closet, so ddil stores her stuff that she doesn't want him to get into up there. Bookshelves (secured to the wall! Is important - this plan is top heavy) have his things on the bottom as high as he can reach, and grown up things like books and photos on the higher shelves. A lot of decorative objects have been packed away for a few years.

Also, you can either pack up the wax melts for after you move, or, you can go clear a high space in the storage room and USE the wax melts while you are working in there when the kids are not home. I vote use - it lets you enjoy them NOW, and reduces the amount you have to store and move.

I've been doing a silly little reduction thing - I have an overstuffed bathroom vanity. One of the categories overstuffing it is lotions. I have so many lotions brought home from hotel stays or (mostly) given to me by students. And my skin is really dry. I started putting one little lotion next to my bed, then every morning I put lotion on my hands, feet, arms and legs before I get dressed. When the container is empty, I open the vanity and grab the first one I see. I have given myself permission to throw the lotion away if I open it and I don't like it (or it has gone off), but so far, I have used up one little bottle and one tube of lotion this year, and am almost done with a third. And my skin is better. So, yeah, use the things.

I didn't do any pottery or bookshelf clearing yesterday - I was tired and I rested. But I made it through (and enjoyed) our concert. Almost fell asleep in the car on the way home though. I got almost eight hours last night.

Tomorrow I have Bean AND Buddy at my house, so I need to clean the floor in here!

I'll check back later.

I just had a thought pop into my head.

What if I started actually packing for moving into my new house? Like, instead of putting books on the shelves, I boxed them up, sealed the boxes, and wrote "books" on it? I could have stacks of boxes all ready with ONLY things I am taking with me.

This assumes I will actually sell my house and move within the year. That is the goal but who even knows?

Thank you SubC, I needed a new set of eyes on this. You are right, they can be pretty feral, and do not follow any rules when I am not here. I have had my son talk to Tot and say NO you CANNOT go into this room/space. She will listen for awhile but then just goes in to get something she thinks she could have, and lets the little ones into the room. I like the slide bolt as a simple solution. And I like the thought of using the top cabinets for my snacks. It is true that over time it has become more like theirs and not mine. As I think about this, I can see how I have hesitated to talk more to dil about the issues, because when I have brought it up, she takes it personally and stays in her bedroom with all the kids all day - which I think she is trying to be considerate. But I don't want them to feel unwanted or like an intrusion. It is a fine balance as she is sensitive and she cares. Having a baby, a one year old, a two year old, and a kindergartener probably feels like a lot. I hoped to be more of a help but they are all sick a lot too.

I need to take back some spaces for my own. You would not believe the bookshelves in the living room - the top shelf and top of the bookshelves piled with books because any books I leave on the lower 3 shelves get pulled out and pages torn. Therefore, I also have stacks of books in my bedroom. I think having that storage bedroom for my things with a lock is a great idea.

Thank you for brainstorming with me.

I did go into the storage bedroom and put a CD holder shelf on a cabinet and started putting CDs into it, and put videos into a bin, and stacked books to go on the little bookshelf in there (when I can get to it - too much stuff in the way). I did find two books that belong to Teen and set them aside. I need to start a bin for things of hers I find around.

So, the main problem I see here (as a mom, a grandmother, and a professional educator) is that your grandchildren are being raised as wild animals. Any child tall enough to reach the counter is old enough to treat the belongings of others with respect.

I understand tired and overwhelmed, but I also know that, while it is easier to give up in the short run, it is easier in the long run (and better for the child) to teach them skills and boundaries. Tot is old enough to be part of the solution!

I feel like your family has moved into your house and forced you into your room.

However, your relationship with them is your business and please don't feel a need to defend them, I am already assuming that you don't feel that way and you think your ddil would help you if she could, so that is not the problem you want solved. But it does inform my approach to the problem, because I'm going to advocate securing you stuff and letting ddil deal with the rest as she will.

I would take everything the kids are allowed to have out of the small storage bedroom and put a lock (even an easy to install small barrel bolt high up) on the door. That is now your room - whatever is left in it you can start sorting and organizing, then add things as you go. Where do you put the things the kids are allowed to have? In their rooms, on the couch, in the public spaces where your stuff isn't safe. yes it's chaos. But right now it sounds like it is all chaos except your nightstand. You deserve at least a whole room without chaos.

Then I would clean out the upper cabinets in the kitchen. These are now your cabinets. Put the things you use and eat (like tea and protein bars - maybe don't buy so many at once?) in your cabinets. If the kids get into ddils snacks or food they weren't supposed to have between meals, or whatever, that's a parenting issue.

Don't clean the floor anymore unless 1) you made the mess or 2) you are teaching tot how and she is actively engaged. Bean cleans up his own spills. He's 4. He damp mops the living and dining rooms at his house every week. He puts away all the socks and burp cloths and restocks the diapers on the changing table and folds all the clean towels at his house. It sounds like they think of this as their house that you live in. Let them clean it.

Ymmv. That might be too confrontational and stressful for you. It may lead to results (like messy floors) that you can't accept. If this won't work for you, ignore it.

Much smaller steps - is there jewelry in the jewelry box? Is there a space to hang it? Can you repair the quilt?

adding - another example:

I have two bags and a box of tea in my room. I love tea and drink it daily so I have a variety. It was in the kitchen in 2 drawers but the kids kept opening them when I am not home and throwing tea bags all over the house. Literally I had to throw away a couple dozen tea bags that were not individually wrapped because they were on the floor covered in dog hair. I struggled with this for months, asking the kids and dil not to let them get into the drawers. But I came home at least once a week to tea bags all over the house, some of them ripped or chewed open. Finally I put them all in bags and a box and they are in my bedroom.

There is so much stuff like that piled in my bedroom now. It is frustrating but what can I do? I considered putting child locks on the drawers, but you have to screw them into the nice wood, plus I just don't want to spend money and do all of that, and besides, it is just a symptom of the out of controlness of everything. I could use the little storage room as a place to keep things, but now the kids get in there and literally climb the shelves to get things I told them they cannot have. I am gone to work most days and so is my son, and I think dil is just too busy and overwhelmed to keep it under control, apparently.

I guess the easiest thing might be to clear that storage bedroom and put a lock on the door, huh?

second post today.

I went into my bedroom quite determined and a little excited to get it in order, make it better. I got a big empty box for donations and an empty paper bag for trash and put them on my bed. I looked around and picked a start point.

But the start point had nothing I wanted to get rid of. So I just started going to the right, around the room. Everything in there seems to be things I cannot throw out or donate. Things I want. I don't know what to do. I got very overwhelmed about 1/4 the way around the room and without donating anything I walked out.

How so you get past this, or is it just me?

I have sorted everything in there so many times now that it feels impossible to get rid of anything else.

Maybe I need to start by sorting into boxes or something? Like with like? I don't even know, but my desk is unusable, covered in piles as is my office chair and all the floor around the desk.

Help?

Things I looked at in like that small 1/4 to 1/3 of my room, in piles:
about 10 boxes of protein bars (no space in kitchen)
candy, snacks I want for myself
a scanner that I can't put out because the kids will ruin it
a game from my childhood
a wooden box of childhood photos
a box of records from the 1920s that was my grandparents (I bought a record player to play them on, but can't set anything up with all the kids ruining things)
a blood pressure cuff
old planners with important info in them
a monitor I want to use but can't set up yet
a wax melt warmer that I really like but can't put out with the kids here, and a bunch of nice wax melts
a hanging jewelry box
stacks of papers, files, and books
stacks of CDs of music I love - I have sorted them down to maybe 25
a quilt that was my son's as a baby that needs a repair to give to my grandson
boxes of dog treats that I feed my dog from daily
boxes of tools
photo albums
bins of photos from my kids' childhood
bags of cough drops and medicine

so much more...

but see, most of these things have a place, but had to be put away because toddlers and preschoolers being here, they ruin things, and I can't even keep the dog treats in the dining room anymore because they will feed them ALL to the dog and make him sick. What am I supposed to do with all this stuff that WILL have a home eventually? Should I just box it and put it in a corner so I have a room without piles??