hi all, thank you for your kind comments. CM, I read a book by St Augustine during covid. Maybe some of it is in my brain somewhere, coming out in this meditation.

I am so exhausted. Worked today and came home. My living room, kitchen, dining room, hall, entry are covered in toys, clothes, shoes, food, trash, and playdoh (like, in the carpet). It stressed me out, so after I picked up a few things I just came and shut myself in my room so I could work a little more. I think dil will clean it up, she is pretty good about it at the end of the day. But looking at playdoh in carpet, on tables, on floor stressed me out. It is not worth being stressed over, so I am avoiding it.

Part of me is terribly sad about something, but I am not quite sure what.

Everybody's got a lot going on and I won't do it justice because I have a limited time right now, but I did read the posts.

Lila, try and get some probiotics if you can, to rebuild your gut microbiome. That should speed recovery.

We had our bunny fundraiser Saturday. Didn't get as many people as we'd hoped, though since the venue was small, perhaps that was all right. We made enough to make it worth it, probably, and got a large donation from an individual that was more than the take from the event.

I wasn't completely exhausted, but did opt to take a St. Paddy's Day nap yesterday. Today I've been uploading photos of the fundraiser to our Facebook.

Lila, the meditation you posted reminds me of St. Augustine's saying that our hearts are restless until they rest in God. Sometimes I'm not sure what for me is spiritual emptiness vs. ADHD dopamine depletion, but I know it does help to put the prayer time in, that seems to calm everything and bring hope.

Roommate has been decluttering quite a bit and I want to let it inspire me - she is more efficient and decisive, which is good to watch and hopefully imitate. She is eager to get her items gone quickly. That is smart of her! So I may help her with that part, by making the dropoff run.

It was cooler in the afternoon yesterday, dipped down into the 20s last night and is going to get up to 70s tomorrow. Kansas in March!

Good morning. I am a bit sad because we are leaving Birdy today, but I am also ready to get back to my life. Also I am allergic to the two dogs and it will be nice to wake up without my head completely stuffed.

We went to see my son play rec league hockey last night - which was fun, but disorienting. He was a tiny kid and a late bloomer, so I struggled to find him at first - my brain did not want him to be one of the tall players. He's pretty good.

Tatoulia, I hope you get things straightened out with the car easily and that your little house works out. Can you make it a screensaver or put a picture on a cardboard sleeve for your cc - whatever you will see before you I something? Do you think bf will sell his place there?

Lila, keep resting and being kind to your body. Take it slow.

The emptiness thing is definitely a factor in the stuff. I know I keep a lot of things because they evoke memories of times or people who are gone. I kept a lot of my sons clothes from when he was a baby and they felt very precious. Yesterday I was holding my grandson while his mommy packed up the newborn and 0 to 3 month clothes for me to take back for the "baby library" (I brought two new bins of toys and clothes) and there were a couple where she said "he never wore this" and I looked at it and thought "get rid of it." - the fasteners and fabrics are so much nicer now... the clothes have become about dressing real babies now, not aching over babies who are grown and living good lives.

It is a constant struggle for me to fill my life with people and experiences instead of stuff.

Ok, gotta pack up.

Lila I enjoyed yoir post very much. Will give me something to think about.

Go slowly with eating! And vegetables are not your friend after stomach issues. Go slowly. So awful what you have been through.

I did very little today. Boston is very much a St Patrick's Day town and even though I'm not on the parade route (I'd guess a mile or two away) there are a lot of people on the streets. I went to grocery store to get a few things. Having two cats truly means twice the amount of cat food. They go through so much! And they really are great cats even if I am a little creeped out about having two.

I did precious little today but did have a few long telephone calls with BF about some issues with his land overseas. He also has an issue with his place here but I didn't want to tell him so I'll do that this week. All is fine, it's just his real estate taxes are through the roof now that it is no longer owner/occupied.

I did clean out the cat boxes and did some laundry. But mainly just frittered my day away.

The little house I am looking to buy is in the Mediterranean. I would have never considered living someplace warm. It is very small, for one or two people at most. It's a confluence of events that brings me to the house. I would probably not live there but instead go three times a year. Bf right now is an hour away so it would work out for us.

My mother's dearest friends (and were mentioned in her obituary) ended up being people that I was very, very close with when I was in my 20s. They were probably a good 15 years older than my mother and they had a daughter who is probably fifteen years older than me. I only got to know the daughter once her mother died, as the daughter lives overseas. We are now very close and I am her only family. We got to talking about two of her houses and I asked if she'd ever consider selling the guest house separately from the main house. And so here we are. The nice thing is we can transfer the funds from my US account to her US account and not lose $$ in transfer fees and doing it piecemeal. So that's how we got here.

I just need to have something to look forward to. I don't mind if we sell it in a few years when we retire. It may be just a dream but I'm going to work hard to make it happen.

Hoarding lenten insight below - tell me what you think, please!

hi Tatoulia! I didn't think your post was babbles at all. In fact I enjoyed it quite a bit! Felt kind of like a conversation, interesting. You are buying a place overseas? I am not caught up on posts and don't remember this. Are you moving to be with bf?

I am still a bit on the weak and dizzy side so worked from home this morning. An hour and a half was enough for this brain. I am having a piece of cinnamon toast with coffee. Thinking about making a recipe with some of the veggies in the fridge. I think I could eat normal food now.

I mentioned a Lenten insight on hoarding that I wanted to share. It is maybe not a huge epiphany, but it is helping me. For Lent this year I purchased a book called Restore: A guided lent journal for prayer and meditation. I got it from the Catholic bookstore (I am not Catholic, but we are all one body, right?) Each day since Ash Weds it has a little short devotional and a question. One of the things this meditation brought out is that I have a resistance to emptiness. In the devo called "the ache of emptiness", it says about fasting: "What happens within you as you experience the ache of the things you have surrendered for the season?... we might notice that when we feel the ache and emptiness that the object of our fasting filled, we may immediately give in to it. We promise ourselves that we can make up for it later and instead indulge now in the thing we chose to give up."

Of course this is applied to fasting from foods, specific or altogether, but also can be applied to anything we wish we could give up or try to 'fast' from for a season, like no-spend November or buying things or a bad habit. What lit a light bulb in me was, those things... eating, hoarding, smoking, drinking, spending, anything... is filling an ache and emptiness. And when we take that away, we are left with the core ache and emptiness.

This is what is being explored next in the devotional. WHAT is the core ache? What are you trying to satisfy? Do you remember a time, even as far back as childhood, where you felt that specific ache and emptiness - the feelings associated with it? When I pondered this, a very specific and painful memory from when I was maybe 3 or 4 years old popped up and I just wept.

I think, at least for me, I have this fearful resistance to emptiness. Empty shelves, empty space around my bed, empty panty, empty stomach.

Trying to fill that emptiness has led to hoarding and obesity. I find this very profound. The devo will continue on in exploring the memories, feelings, the emptiness and ache and how to heal this, or rather, let Jesus heal it.

I hope this is helpful to someone here! I'd be very interested in any thoughts on this topic, even if you disagree. Please share.

I got the car's exhaust fixed today. There was a long wait but then the actual work took about 15 minutes. Went very well.

The young woman taking the car is still having money issues but i emphasized with her dad that we need to transfer the car by the end of the month. I'll help them financially if it comes to that. I paid for the repairs today and the father was grateful. It was good to have the car running and I did run a quick errand but I just don't want to keep it. Time to move it along.

So that's what's up. I may gather a bag and go to goodwill donations tmr with the car.

I received an Easter brunch invitation so I'm feeling pretty good about that! Was hoping for one of two people to invite me.

I'm working on the house and feeling very good about it. Found a good home for my mother's mink coat. It's reversible and good quality. I have issues with fur and fur/wearing and was so glad to find someone who was so grateful to receive it as a gift. That was nice.

I'm spending more money than I should on stuff I don't need or want. I need to pull it together. It's all wasted, esp when I'm trying to buy a place overseas and there's a chance BF will not be going halvsies with me on it. I have all the info on the place and I know the seller very well so I just want to pull the trigger despite not having the $$ just yet.

I am babbling. I don't know what my problem is. I'm so sorry. Forgive me. My mind is jumbled. I'll get a donation bag together tomorrow and I'll feel better.

aww I am glad you are with Birdy and enjoying this special time!

I am still a bit loopy. Able to eat, and did some cursory cleaning (which was swallowed up by the grandkids within 2 hours) but unable to do much else. Extremely tired.

Oh poor Lila! I am so sorry! Years ago I dreamt of a service where I would go to people's homes and air out their bedrooms and change the linens when they were sick. I so wish I could do that for you!

Oh dear Lila! I am so sorry you have been so sick! Rest and recover. Give yourself plenty of time please.

I am having a lovely time with Birdy's family. Ddil has been very generous with sharing him and ds is home now and I am enjoying him as well.

Bean called on the computer today and told me about going by my house to water my seedlings and that they had found the treat I hid in the fridge for them (and told dsil about) He also demonstrated how to eat a banana (when you have teeth) for his cousin and showed off the kangaroo family he made in nature class.

I am doing some mental planning and general rethinking of daily life while I am here. Also gaining weight I'm pretty sure. Ddil must stop making lovely cakes.

Hello! Instead of your usual busy Lila who was not around due to work, it was something new. What was Lila doing since Monday, you ask? Lila was vomiting! Yes. Worst stomach bug ever. I did not cease vomiting for approximately 20 hours. Like every 10-20 minutes day and night. Then I was trying to recover but still feeling quite sick and unable to eat. But today I am eating bland foods, and starting to feel like a human again.

I did not read your posts yet - that's next.

Yesterday I was finally able to shower (with a shower chair) and in the evening, washed my sheets. It was all I could do to get them back on the bed, but I needed to not be so gross and disgusting.

Today I managed to unload 1/3 of the dishwasher but could not finish.

I am enjoying sitting outside in the sunshine for little stretches of time with my dogs.

I have a little Lenten reflection on hoarding that I want to share, but am worn out, so will do so in a bit.

Hi everyone! I'm here!

Working on stuff. Getting car cleaned out. Had a dental implant put in today and have been sleeping since. I want to do some cleaning up here (it's 11 PM) and then head back to bed.

Taking car to the exhaust guy on Saturday. I've decided to drive it instead of the shenanigans of waiting for someone to tow it. The AAA people can take forever. Hoping I can get it there without too much noise.

Will be a big relief. I have to be out of my garage on the last day of the month.

Bunny planter complete, including the flowers!

Trying not to fret about spring starting to feel too busy and fragmented already. Probably also still adapting to the time change and may feel more on top of things after that is done.

I got the bunny planter reprimed and painted white. It just needs the features - eyes, nose, and the inner ears painted pink. Then a top sealing coat of Mod Podge, then the floral arrangement needs to be made. It'll be in a container that can just pop in and out.

Late afternoon I heard from the ladies that the bunny club's general brochure, which I had worked on revisions of, wasn't printing properly at the printer - margins were off. I wrestled with the thing for over an hour. This is what it is to have some design and layout knowledge but not enough. My skills are piecemeal. I think maybe I got it okay in the end. I need to save the thing as another document to use as a template for any future brochures I make for bunny club or whatever else. You can't find a simple Word doc for a plain white brochure that you add your own stuff to as easily as I'd hoped - everything is all colorful and prefab.

SubC, I agree the mornings are too dark - this is something that if I had to go early to work I would hate also. And I never thought about living on the east or west of a time zone, as I live pretty smack dab in the middle of mine, I think. I struggle a lot with time, calendars, changing weather, day length, seasons, months that end in the middle of weeks vs. the beginnings - you name it, I'm confused or discombobulated by it! 😛

Another thing is changing lighting contrasts - I had migraines in the last few days after not having any for awhile (which was SO nice) and right now my eyes are saying I have been on the computer dangerously long, so I will sign off for now.

Good afternoon.

Bean and I have had a good day.

We baked tea bread, played hide and seek and brio trains, went for a walk in the woods to take pictures for my pottery homework, planted eight irises around the grape arbor stakes, but rocks on the tarps that were blowing out of place, and moved three out of the four lost and rediscovered rhubarb plants. (The fourth one is encased in the riots of a tree that should not be there. I cut it last year and it came back from the stump, so Dh is going to pull it for me when the ground gets drier.)

Tonight I have class and tomorrow Dh and I leave to visit Birdy.

Good morning.

The computer monster just ate my nearly finished post.

CM, I'm glad that at least you enjoy daylight savings time.

For me it is the season of losing my mornings, struggling to get ready for work on time, and going back to morning chores in the dark just when it was finally light. Later I will struggle to go to bed at a reasonable hour because there is too much light in the evenings. It doesn't help that I live on the western edge of my time zone.

Last night I stayed too long talking to the farmsitter's mom after I milked the cow. I didn't get to bed until ten, and I was very tired so I slept until 6:30. Only to come downstairs and discover that it was already 7:30. Now I am tired, sore, and stressed about getting things done before the kids arrive with Bean.

Lila, I forgot to say congratulations on the new grandbaby! We will both have new ones in the fall! You are getting quite a set!

Good job on the fridge project!

I continue to hope that your teen can find a way back to a better relationship with you. I have a question about your post language - is that a change in how teen is is self-referring or a gender reveal? And should we use female pronouns now?

I did a little bit of pottery yesterday afternoon. Nothing impressive.

The morning is half gone, so I need to get moving.

I just went around and set the clocks forward! It seemed like a long time until this eagerly anticipated task, and yet it also flew by. And St Patrick's Day is a week from tomorrow, and Easter only three weeks from tomorrow - whoa.

We have a bunny event the 16th. Been starting preparations for that. I need to paint a large papier mache rabbit shaped planter for them and do a silk floral arrangement in the basket attached to the rabbit. And prepare for roommate and I to do a craft project with kids at the event.

Lila, I don't want to be a mother hen but if you have any concerns about Acorn getting carried away with the bookshelf it might be good to get some wall anchors for it just in case. And for the books themselves, perhaps some bins for the lower shelf books. Just some ideas. It's so good for a kid to grow up with books. I learned to read and write before kindergarten by my mom reading to me and she would take folded paper and staple it into mini books that I could write and draw in. Fun times! Sometimes I think I got more writing done then than I do now despite my stated intentions, lol. Life was simpler.

hi SubC, I will look around and think about it that way. See if I can shift kid friendly things with not kid friendly things.

I did get the fridge cleaned out, omg it was a mess. I took everything out of every compartment except the fruit drawer (ran out of steam), threw away a bag of things that had gone bad, washed out the shelves, and reorganized. I put several items in the other downstairs fridge and now, my fridge is clean, pretty full still, but you can actually find things. And I know what is in there to use.

I also am doing some laundry for Teen, despite how unkind she is to me, because I love her and want her to be taken care of. I did explain to her that the way she speaks to me and detests me is hurtful, and pointed out that I am still doing things for her because I love her. I asked her to consider that, and try to think of me in a more positive light.

I am emotionally tired, and don't want to do anything, feel like I need more days off.

My house is so bad!!! I need an intervention.

Good afternoon!

Good luck on the fridge. I have been doing better with my fridge - mostly through limited shopping, but I am not there yet. In a couple of months, the milk and eggs will begin to accumulate faster than we can use them. And not long after that the garden will start producing. I need a plan. Several plans. Plans for meals centered around what is coming in, plans for selling extra eggs, plans for preserving the excess in ways that will cause it to be used effectively in the winter and spring.

As for the shelves/book storage - is there anything in the house that the kids can have free access to that is currently hard for them to get? Could you put those things on the lower shelves and your books on upper shelves and wherever those things are?

Today I slept late because I had a low grade headache all day yesterday that I was pretty sure was from lack of sleep.

Ran a load of laundry - I'm keeping up!

Worked on cleaning out in the barn a little bit (my barn is really bad, and it is just going to take time.) let the ducks out for a while. Gave the does their immunizations plus mineral supplements for the three that are bred. Did a cursory grooming of the one rabbit who was starting to get mats from shedding - no more mats, but he still needs a good brushing. Moved the second grape vine and finished mulching the grape arbor. It's cold outside and I'm feeling wind blown.

I've got four hours before I need to go milk the cow for the last time. Trying to make them useful..

Good morning friends. We had sickness run through the house. I think everyone is better now. But dil is vomiting a lot. Grandbaby #6 is on the way this fall!

I am trying to organize and clean but failing pretty badly. When I am home I am recovering from having to be around people all week and working a lot, but, it is not quiet except for early morning now, so I am finding ways to meet my isolating needs. It's a big learning curve.

I am enjoying having all the kids around me though for the most part. But the house is a disaster area even worse than before. I cannot keep up with it. There is no way. So I am mostly just doing cursory picking-up as I go, and taking care of dishes in the mornings. I did laundry yesterday. I still kind of feel like I am in a strange place, or something.

Today I am going to clean out (not scrub, but you know...) the fridge and freezer because there is not even room for an apple in there, it is so packed with everyone's food. I can't find anything. TotsDad brought their fridge here last week and I am going to see if we can move some of this food downstairs to that fridge. It is just too much, and my food is hidden and going bad because I forget it is in there. So, that's my big project for today.

Another new thing is I have two bookshelves in the living room. I have purged 80% of my books, so what is left is special, truly loved books. And when I was not home little Acorn took my books off the shelf, hid some, bent some covers, ripped a page or two. I find this very stressful so in the moment I just piled all my books on the upper shelves that she can't reach, but it is stacked and looks chaotic. So the other thing I would like to do today is box them up. I don't especially want to put them in the garage, though. I dunno, maybe I can make space for them in my bedroom on a shelf or something, it is kind of stressing me out.

And so it goes. Encouragement welcome.

CM,

The cow is not mine. It belongs to my farm sitter. She is enjoying a kid free work-cation with her partner. Her mom is taking care of the kids and small animals, but can't milk the cow, so her little sister is doing it mornings and I am doing evenings. Two more times.

I am wishing you luck on the storage area.

My internet went out yesterday afternoon and stayed out until some time in the night. It did not make me more productive. I didn't get very much done after my last post. I did finish the laundry. I did not finish the counter. I decided to delay planting because I am worried about things sprouting while I am gone. I read a book. And I stayed up too late reading the book. And now I am really tired.

Today - school and cow. It's supposed to rain all day today and tomorrow. I am less unhappy about milking a wet cow than I am about driving out there in the dark and rain - there are no lights, just a few house windows.

Also, my own yard is mud. I am tired of mud.

Sending love to teen and Lila. Not caught up on posts.

The swim was great.

Did you just get a cow, SubC, or had you had her before? Sorry if I'm being forgetful!

It's a rainy day here though I'm at the library and when I left the house it appeared to be maybe trying to clear up. These last few days have been a bit of this, a bit of that weatherwise, and I think that's how March is liking to be thus far and will continue to be - until it perhaps steadies out. It's tornado preparedness week.

When I was at the storage unit... what was it that I am now trying to recall about that? I know that when I looked I realized there were several areas that really were not in as bad a shape as I had feared. And then there are the areas that have been more intimidating. I think I'm going to consolidate the good somehow and that will feel more manageable and then the doom places I will need to "divide and conquer."

I also realized that there is probably going to be stuff that I'm ready to let go of, and other stuff that I really did feel happy to acquire and perhaps will want to keep. It's a delicate decision making process, to be sure. Books and supplies that if I truly can be creative with or enjoy in whatever way they are meant to be enjoyed (like board games - if I can actually PLAY them with actual people, for instance, perhaps at the senior center, instead of them being in limbo because the friends I used to play them with have been dead a few years now - stuff like that).

I know I had/have so many, many interests. The "had" interests' books and gear vs. the "still have" interests. The former should in most cases go to someone who currently is doing those things. The latter should be kept in a way that better facilitates actual use.

So that is the vision and goal to start with.

Planted and mulched the grape vine. Sorted through the stored pumpkins in the garage and gave the ones that were starting to go to the chickens. Did a 4 month check on the goats for kidding season - three bred, two open, one questionable. Need to do vaccines on Saturday.

Chased away the fox and penned up the ducks. (No losses)

Switched over the laundry, put a load away, and put a new load in the wash. Clean sheets on the bed.

A couple more items off the counter of doom.

Pretty good morning, but I generally get most of what I'm going to get done in a day done before lunch. I've been up almost six and a half hours. It feels colder outside than I thought it would today - close to 50, but dark and damp.

I'm probably going to post a lot today. Working on staying motivated.

I have done yoga and chores, made Dh and myself breakfast (and eaten). The first load of laundry is in the dryer. The second load is in the wash. I took the compost out (and cleaned a container out of my fridge).

The dishwasher is unloaded and the dirty dishes are in it. I took care of a couple of thing# from the counter of doom.

Time to plant the grape vine.

Good morning!

CM, how was your swim,

I had a successful day at school yesterday - more work to check today. Stopped at the grocery store, got gas, and milked the cow.

That cow is a workout. I wake up with significant upper body soreness.

I have more work to do to prep for school today, a grapevine to plant, seedlings to start, and a lot of laundry. Plus must hit the counter of doom. Other things on my list as well, so I am going to try really hard not to spiral. It's supposed to be cloudy today. But warm.

Registration for next year is going well so far - no first day glitches and 7/11 of my classes are already full enough to run and two only need one more student each.

I'd like to be able to get started on my laundry, but Dh is still asleep, so yoga it is..

Lol, my bubble is I suppose 3-6 feet, and I felt like I trained all my life for pandemic social distancing. I can go 2 feet or even 1 provided that the other party is aware that they are in close proximity and are being careful not to brush against me. The thing is, I know what a klutz I am, how I make sudden movements on impulse or just out of clumsiness. At those moments, I can bump into somebody if there's not that margin for error. And that aggravates me and probably them too unless they are the oblivious, rough and tumble type. Some of it's neurodivergence, some of it's having grown up in a roomier house.

Went to storage unit earlier and had some thoughts but have no more time right now to get into that because we are getting ready to go swim. Hopefully later.

Good morning!

CM, other people can be hard. I struggle sometimes even when my kids are here visiting. And I love my kids. I don't know if you are familiar with the concept of a "personal bubble"? It describes how big an empty space you need around you to feel comfortable - like how far away you expect people to stand when you talk to them. Some of it is cultural - New Yorkers in general have much smaller bubbles than those from the rural south, but some of it is personal. My family says my youngest has a personal bubble slightly smaller than her skin - she is always touching people, and that mine is about the size of the county. An exaggeration, but I really prefer not to be able to see neighbors from my yard.

Today is the first day of registration for returning students - aka full inbox morning. The parents have had the schedule for two weeks, but they all waited until after I went to bed last night to email me with questions. If history is any indicator, the parents who really didn't need to ask and got replies like "of course!" And "that's fine." Will diligently check for my response this morning, and the parents who got a detailed explanation about why they can't do what they want will have already contacted my boss to tell her I haven't responded and ask HER to make an exception for them. She will get in this morning and forward all of those to me with "please reply".

I am a little sore from milking the cow last night.

I got a good start in the barn yesterday morning, but i spiraled down when it started raining. Right now I need to check the projects that I put off far too long and get ready for school. Cow again tonight and that is all I'm going to try to do today.

SubC, it's largely me being still not used to a small shared space. Roommate grew up in a small house with a large family and I was an only child in a medium sized house with a basement, and for many years lived on my own, therefore becoming quite set in my ways. Only when finances got really bad (and the circumstances of that are too heartbreaking to discuss) did I have to try to live with others. Even though they have been nice others, it feels like surrendering a lot of control over everything from personal space, to scheduling matters, to cooking aromas and other things that are sensory overload. And I haven't been very good at adapting, and we sometimes get irritated, and it is just plain hard. Not that we don't have fun times too, yet I can't help wishing for my own place. I know it's gotta be the right time and now is not it, so... just have to muddle through the best we can.

Yay! Lila is back!

I was thinking about you while you were gone, but not talking at you because I knew you were too busy to post.

I hear you on becoming overwhelmed and quitting on the room, but what you did sounds like a really good start. Positive steps forward and fully completed tasks.

Thank you for mentioning the tea. I have backslid on the evening snacking and need to refocus.

I think you can ask ddil to not put things on the table. You can say "I would really love to be able to all eat together, but I know it's really crowded in here. I've been trying to come up with a way to not have to use this table as storage. Can you help me? Do you see anything we could shift to make a better space to put stuff when it comes in?" Something like that.

I'm glad teen has another place to go where they are loved so you can have a break. I'm so sorry about the incident. I hope you get some rest.

CM, the scheduling around another person thing is hard. I get frustrated when Dh gets up early because I end up not doing yoga. I feel awkward doing yoga when he is up and moving around the space, like I am intruding on his day. But really, I should just do it. He wants me to be healthy and in good shape. I'm not saying you should necessarily just do what you want and ignore your roommate, that is a very specific me thing, but also, be sure that when you are accommodating her it is actually what she wants and not just what you think she wants - although it sounds like you two communicate well.

I started my pottery class last night. It was fun. I think it is going to be really good. Also I got some new clay to try. I like it a lot, which is kind of bad because it is more expensive than my usual clay. Also, I have not made a dent in the scrap clay in my studio. We'll see how the finished pieces look. I have homework.

We are leaving to visit Birdy in a week. I am feeling both excited and overwhelmed. I have a lot I need to get done today. I also really need a shower.

Ok, off to get started. Will report back later.

post 2, what I am doing today.

I am struggling with the small bedroom upstairs. It used to be my kids' room, at one point it was a guest room, then a play room, then Teen's room, then back to a play room. Now, it is a storage unit.

It was so bad today I could open the door but that is all. No ability to step inside or reach anything except the dog food right by the door.

I have been tossing (literally throwing) bags and boxes of things in there getting ready for TotsFam.

Today I tried to work on it a little. I pulled out one bag of dog food and poured it into the dog food bin in the kitchen. I pulled out a box, a whole bunch of paper bags and plastic bags, and a bunch or reusable cloth bags. The cloth bags will go in my car, maybe with a few plastic bags. The rest is going in the trash because I have no room and I have no time to drive them to be recycled. I just need to be able to get into the room.

Then I started placing smaller fragile things of Teen's onto a wall shelf so the grandkids can't break them. Then found a broken item of Teen's childhood, was very sad, threw it away.

Became overwhelmed and quit.

There are two plastic shelves in there with not much stuff on them, but I can't get to them. There is a bed piled with stuff, several tubs and totes of stuff, a bookshelf of stuff... it is overwhelming.

My goal is to clear a path to a shelf (even if I have to chuck things from the floor onto the bed pile or to the side) and start placing things I want to keep on shelves.

That is all.