WHAT TO SAY?

What to say?
ForMac
Posted: 11 February 2016 - 09:55 PM
 

I've just found this website after desperately looking for help online. My sister and her Husband just had a baby that our whole family is happy about but their home is very unsafe for a newborn-especially for one that will be mobile in 6-8 months. Clutter everywhere, small items/trinkets on all surfaces, and counters/floors that have never been cleaned or wiped and I want to help so much! I also would still like to be in their lives and not have them push me away if I make them angry by suggesting or offering to help them clean-up. Both of them have college degrees and mean well. What can I do and say to help my niece have a clean and safe home???

 

Replies (5)

Tillie
Posted: 12 February 2016 - 06:53 PM
 

I really like Roxie's ideas.
Plan a day to "baby Proof" the house.
Even bring over some outlet protector caps and some cabinet locks etc.
Look online for a check list of things people do to make a home baby safe.
Then segue into the sanitation issues.

Good luck 🙂

 
dave
Posted: 12 February 2016 - 12:52 PM
 

I think Roxie has some great comments and they put something else in my mind.

A college degree may be relevant in relation to the size of the words you can use in speaking to someone but it is totally irrelevant to what you wish to accomplish with your sister (IMO). And college degrees do not mean that someone else, even from a same family unit will have our same values in regard to using and maintaining a living space.

One other thing i would suggest might be important to keep in mind as you approach the situation is a question that Mrs Dave has been known to ask me: "Who are you doing/saying this for?" ie Am I trying to help Mrs Dave or am I just trying to make myself feel better in the given situation?

Try to recognize that in yourself as you think about the situation you are looking at. From the outside, looking at your post, it seems to me like you might be looking at a spectrum-Safety at one end where they may not recognize the dangers the small objects pose to a small child-or be so overwhelmed with the volume of stuff to deal with that they don't know how to do it-to cleanliness at the other end-for your own mental comfort wanting them to maintain a level of household cleanliness they simply don't care about.

 
Roxie
Posted: 12 February 2016 - 12:21 PM
 

This is an interesting question, so I hope many others here respond. My instinct is to say something like "can I come over and have a baby-safe day with you?" And when she asks what that is, emphasize reorganizing so unsafe items are out of reach and sight/ electrical plugs blocked, etc? Then you can just offer to throw in some mopping? I don't know how your sister would repond, but ... hope the idea helps.

 
Dave
Posted: 12 February 2016 - 05:31 AM
 

Penny, I'm concerned about a new mother and baby being able to live safely in your home. As grownups we forget how curious and tactile little kids are. Could I help you with some cleaning and organizing of the living space you and the baby will come home to after the hospital?

 
Dave
Posted: 12 February 2016 - 03:09 AM
 

Some Years after the event described in the post, Mrs Dave angrily informed me that we had no pictures of kids that did not also have boxes of c*** in the background.

 
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